Jon and Kate Minus Me

When I first got cable, Jon and Kate Plus Eight was one of my favorite shows. I also have a large family, four children and four stepchildren. I appreciated Kate's coupon clipping, yard saling, and constant quest for affordable organic food. This family is supposed to be different--that's why they have their own show--but I liked them because they seemed a lot like my family and the other large families I am close to.

However, after I watched the show for a while, cracks began to appear in Kate's faux finish, and I realized that certain things just didn't make sense. They aren't at all like a normal large family. Here are just a few of the differences:

1. The children are violent with each other, and neither parent seems to care. When you are caught up in how cute they are--and they are indeed beautiful children--you don't notice. After a while, you notice that the older kids are always slapping around the younger ones, and that the younger kids are always hitting each other. Once I saw Kate hit Jon, I realized that the kids are getting this from their parents. There is no respect for each other in this family--none at all. I've been looking. I feel sad for them.

2. For all the talk about organics, you never actually see anyone eating them, or anything healthy for that manner. Instead it's a constant line up of packaged snacks and sugary juices. The parents are always calling these things treats, but it's all you see the kids eating.

3. Individual identities are discouraged. There are a lot of multiples in my family, and while they look cute in matched outfits on holidays, it is devastating to a child's personal identity to be forced into wearing the same outfit as their four sisters every single day. Everything these kids own is identical to their siblings, and chosen by their mother or a sponsor. Forced may seem like a harsh word, but do you think small children honestly don't want to pick out their own toys, books, and extracurricular activities.

4. They aren't allowed to be kids. Mom specifically forbids messy activities. Crayons--rarely. Television--always on. Markers--absolutely not, not even when they are at a Crayola museum. Wii--whenever they want. Kate is a self admitted germaphobe, dirtaphobe, and you never see her letting the kids mess their hair much less get really dirty. It's a backward way of raising little people, who need to explore and get their hands in things. Dirt is good for children, and excessive cleaning keeps mothers from being present in the kids' lives.

5. They are the opposite of green. Everything they own is new with tags and things are replaced regularly. There is a constant parade of clothing, toys, cars, and even houses. Now they are in a mansion with acres of lawn. It's just a little excessive, especially considering that the parents speak at churches talking about their financial hardships, raking in hundreds of thousands of dollars in donations every year.

6. They are very immature for their age and neither parent seems concerned. Their speech, the use of pacifiers and loveys, their motor coordination, etc, all seem more typical of a two year old than a child about to enter kindergarten. I wonder if this is due to problems at birth, or if parents and producers are encouraging them to stay younger and cuter as long as possible.

7. The children never have privacy. I have seen many reality shows, and this is the first one where you see children going to the bathroom, bathing, and other intensely personal activities. I can imagine how much this will suck when the sextuplets go to school and all of their classmates have video of them pooping on the bathroom floor. I wonder if this level of exposing children in intimate areas of their lives is even technically legal. I would love to have my own reality show, but there would be boundaries.

I worry for these kids, especially with rumors surrounding Dad's behavior. I know how vicious rumors can be, but I also know that I am one of many viewers who stopped watching the show a season or so ago because something just isn't right with this family.