Sage Mommy Says

Simple Living: Clothing

2010-05-03T08:00:00.000-07:00

I read somewhere that the average American female owns something like eighty shirts. Even if half of these shirts are off-season, this stills leaves the hypothetical female in question with enough shirts to go a month without doing laundry.

I probably own this number of tops. My weight fluctuates wildly, which accounts for some of the excess. I live in an area with temperatures over a year ranging more than 100 degrees Fahrenheit, which adds to my wardrobe needs. However, there is no denying that I simply have too many shirts. I decided to pare back, and here is how I did it:

1. If it's too big, it goes. It's one thing to keep my skinny clothes because I dream of fitting into them. But am I dreaming of gaining a few pounds? Of course not. I have several friends who are a little bustier than me who will happily take the hand-me-downs.

2. If it's not my style, it goes. I get a lot of hand-me-downs--no complaints here. There are items I love, items I pass on to someone else, and items I wish I could wear without feeling like a kid playing dress-up but for some reason can't. I tend to keep the last group anyway. Today I am passing them on.

3. Keep a light at the end of the tunnel. I made a deal with myself that for every five shirts I got rid of, I would buy one I really love from a local thrift store. This helped me make some hard decisions. Children aren't the only ones who respond to bribes, and I have already earned three 'new' tops. This will require a ten dollar expenditure, but ultimately expand my useable wardrobe while also giving me a little more closet space.

Once you have finished with shirts, why not move on to pants, dresses, and pajamas? Make sure you are giving away or donating these garments where possible, and replacing them with used ones. This keeps your fashion carbon-neutral and keeps small children out of third-world sweatshops.

Simple Living: Eating Out

2010-05-02T15:12:00.000-07:00

I recently watched a rerun of an Oprah show on voluntary simplicity. It was such an inspiring show that I visited Oprah's website to read the comments. It was a little depressing to find that many of the comments were from people who felt that they can't afford to live more simply.

This seems counterintuitive to me, because needing less money to survive is one of the major points of simple living. It was emphasized on the show; for example, one woman was comfortably supporting a family herself as an elderly caregiver, which pays just a bit more than minimum wage. If you can live comfortably on a smaller income, you are free to either find a job you love more, or to work less hours. Simple living is a frugal choice, without any kind of investment needed. It's hard to see how using less electricity would cost more, unless you think the only way to scale back is to go solar.

I have been thinking about my blog for a while, but unsure of what to post here. I hate sounding preachy, and for the record, I don't think I am always a model of green living. However, I am doing my best on a daily basis to use less and less, and to make what I use more meaningful. After reading the comments on Oprah's website, I decided to devote space here to cheap, common sense ways of living a little more simply.

Here is one tip on scaling back on eating out, something which kills many American budgets. We all have our favorite restaurants. Figure out how much you spend for one fast food meal. In my case, it's about $4-5 per person. Next, figure out how much a meal at your favorite restaurant would cost. My favorite cuisine is Indian, so I'm looking at $12-15 per person. Is one Indian meal worth three drive thru meals? Absolutely, at least to me.

We don't eat fast food a lot, but I certainly know it is there in an emergency. We have fewer 'emergencies' if I know there is an Indian restaurant visit coming a little closer every time I think ahead and pack sandwiches. Trading food we really don't like for more food we love is not a hard switch, but these are the decisions that will get you on the road to more simple living.

The Great 20th Century Cookbook

2010-02-22T11:39:00.000-08:00

I love to read about how people used to keep their homes and cook, and the easiest way to do this is to purchase old cooking and housekeeping books. My latest acquisition, The Great 20th Century Cookbook from 1902, is a little frightening however.

Although we think of modern lives as being filled with chemicals, they clearly were a large part of life in 1902 as well. I can't imagine keeping cobalt, powdered lead, and other chemicals in my home, but the housekeeping section of my book seems to assume that housewives have these things lying around. When we work with cobalt or lead in the lab, we wear thick rubber gloves, safety goggles, and face masks.

Another common misperception, and I am sure I have pointed this out before, is the relative lack of meat in the turn-of-the-century diet. The menus provided in the book seem to include moderate amounts of meat once a day. This is confirmed by other old cookbooks I have collected. One from the forties tells housewives that they should try to increase their meat intake to once per day. The portions are small in both books--this new one thinks a single calve's liver can feed a family. In my house, that would be more than enough because no one would want more than a bite!

The lack of cleanliness is the other thing that is striking. In my 1902 book, dusting is believed to be bad for the health. Instead of kicking up dust inside, housewives were supposed to drag out the furniture and dust in the yard. The book recommends doing this once or twice per year. Similarly, this housewife was told that heavy carpets don't have to be taken out and beaten every year. Every other year is fine... remember that this is before vacuum cleaners.

From reading the book, it seems that cooking and laundry were enough to keep a woman hopping. The process for doing laundry begins with starting a wood fire in your yard early in the morning and ends with ironing and starching well into the night. With people wearing maybe one or two outfits on a regular basis, this is a lot of work for a small amount of actual clean laundry. It makes hanging out my laundry seem so easy that I am a little embarrassed for all the times I have resorted to using a dryer.

Here are few other interesting tidbits of information that most of us now would consider questionable:
1. Night air causes illness.
2. People with fevers should be given only a small ration of water or they will become sicker.
3. Wine is very bad for you and should be administered only on a doctor's order. Cocaine and opiates are better and more modern choices, even for children, and can be used liberally for a variety of ailments.
4. Hydrophobia, now called rabies, can be cured with a root called elecampane soaked in fresh milk. (Rabies is incurable once symptoms set in.)
5. For poison oak, apply lead powder directly to the rash.

Some of the folk remedies are harmless enough that I plan to try them, although powdered lead will not be making its debut in my medicine cabinet anytime soon. The point is that we tend to romanticize old times as being cleaner, safer, and less complicated, when just the opposite seems to be true. Today I am going to count my blessings as my clothing washer takes a full day's worth of work off my hands.

Say Hello to Spring with Yummy Vegetarian Meals

2010-02-19T20:30:00.000-08:00

In the winter, I just want meat. I try to hold back for the sake of my waistline and the billions of people who share the planet with me, but it can be a struggle.

I found the following three vegetarian recipes in various places on the internet and really loved all of them. They are hearty and comforting, which is important on a cold, dark day. Best of all, they use things that can be found in the average house, or at least in the average grocery store.

1. Mock Crab Cakes
The creator of the recipe says these taste just like crab cakes and my kids beg to differ because we hate crabcakes, but we love these. My husband the crabcake lover says they are by no means a crab cake, but that they are quite good. Either way, they are delicious, and I can see potential for modifying the recipe to suit what's in the farmer's markets once we are back in fresh produce season.

2 c coarsely grated zucchini (liquid drained, squeeze out)
1 c Panko bread crumbs
2 T grated onion
2 T mayonnaise
2 T cream cheese (opt, I add)
2 eggs
2 t old bay seasoning
1 T chopped parsley
2 T garlic (minced dried or fresh works)
In a mixing bowl, combine all ingredients, mix and shape into cakes.
Put by tablespoon or cookie scoop onto a fry pan with your favorite oil and fry.
And once you mix the "batter" use it immediately so it does not get soggy.
I make up the batter then throw in zucchini and then the panko bread crumbs last and make them all right away.

2. Low Fat Vegetable and Pasta Casserole
Ingredients
1 (16 ounce) package penne or rotini pasta--best and most filling with whole grain pasta
2 cups chopped broccoli
1 cup mushrooms, sliced
1 cup green bell pepper, chopped
1 onion, chopped
1 garlic clove, minced
1 tablespoon butter
1/4 cup flour
4 cups skim milk
1/2 cup parmesan cheese or romano cheese
white pepper (I used black, no biggie)
5 tablespoons fresh basil, chopped (I used 1 1/4 Tbsp dried basil)
1/3 cup dry breadcrumbs
butter-flavored cooking spray (I suggest skipping this. You don't need butter-flavored chemicals... simply toss the breadcrumbs with a little melted butter.)
1. Cook pasta 6 minutes in boiling water.
2. Add the broccoli through bell pepper to the pasta and simmer 6-8 minutes more until pasta is al dente; drain.
3. Make white sauce: sauté the onions and garlic in butter 1-2 minutes in a saucepan over medium-high heat; stir in flour and milk and cook, stirring, about 5 minutes until mixture coats the back of a spoon; remove from heat.
4. Setting aside 2 Tbs parmesan cheese, stir the rest of cheese and the pepper into the white sauce.
5. Combine the pasta and vegetables, white sauce and 4 Tbs of the basil; place in 13 X 9-inch baking pan or 3-1/2 quart casserole.
6. Mix the breadcrumbs with the remaining 2 Tbs parmesan & remaining 1 T basil; sprinkle over the casserole.
7. Spray butter-flavored spray over top to coat.
8. Bake at 350° approximately 30 minutes until golden brown.
Came out bubbly and great even with my few little changes.

3. Baked Lentils With Cheese, from the Less Is More:Recipes and suggestions by Mennonites on how to eat better and consume less of the world's limited food resources cookbook. Lots of vegetarian recipes in this book that still feel like real food! Plus, this is a super cheap and super healthy dish, especially if you stock up on cheese while it is on sale like we do.
Preheat oven to 375
Combine in shallow 9X13 baking dish:
1 3/4 C lentils, rinsed
2 C. water
1 whole bay leaf (I skipped it because I don't really like bay leaves)
2 t. salt
1/4 t. pepper
1/8 t. each marjoram, sage, thyme
2 Large onions, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 c. canned tomatoes
Cover tightly and bake 30 mins.

Uncover and stir in:
2 large carrots, sliced
1/2 C thinly sliced celery
Baked covered 40 mins. until veggies are tender. Stir in:
1 green pepper, chopped (optional)
2 T. finely chopped parsley
Sprinkle on top:
3 C shredded cheddar cheese
Bake uncovered, 5 min until cheese melts.

The Laura Ingalls Test

2010-02-11T16:22:00.001-08:00

Today I was at Target and I saw something I thought I needed at a price I couldn't pass up: children's jeans for $10. My second grader and kindergartner have both outgrown about half of their wardrobes in this new year. They each have about five pair of school pants left, which are becoming more worn by the day. It makes sense to buy these high enough quality jeans and fill their wardrobe out a little. Yet I put them back and walked away (sadly).

At the same time, I have been reading the Laura Ingalls books--again--this time with my 7-year-old daughter, the one who 'needs' pants. In these books, the narrator repeatedly mentions having only one or two dresses each year, plus an old patched one from the year before to swim and play in. In this context, five pair of school pants, plus skirts, dresses, church clothes, and a drawer of play clothes, seems enough. Even excessive.

In the nineteenth century and before, consumer goods were made by intense labor. Growing cotton is hard on land and hard on workers. It had to be spun into thread and woven into cloth before Mrs. Ingalls spent hours cutting and sewing it into the garment her daughter would wear. The process hasn't changed a lot. We have some mechanization, and we have passed off the labor to the third world, but making garments is still a labor intensive activity.

Here's where the Laura Ingalls test comes in: imagine talking to Mrs. Ingalls and saying that you need to buy new clothing for a child that has five presentable outfits. She seems like a polite type, but she would certainly be surprised if not dismayed. If you are like many American families, you could also imagine telling her that your family is already in debt and that you might even put this purchase on credit as well. One hundred years ago, this would have been viewed as highly irresponsible.

This is an amusing mind game to play whenever you find yourself about to make an impulse buy at any price. Here's a less pleasant one. Picture yourself explaining the situation to a mother in the modern day third world instead. Her government accepted money from a US corporation to kick their family off their ancestral farm land, which is now being destroyed by cotton crops. With nowhere to live, she and her family moved to town, where the only way to survive is to work twelve hour days, seven days a week, in a factory where our $3 t-shirts are made. Even the toddlers. And they barely make enough to out rice and beans on the table once a day. This is the true story of our clothing, repeated over and over in every country you see on a clothing label after "Made In". Would she understand? They don't resent us because of George W. Bush. It goes farther and deeper than that.

This isn't a guilt trip. We aren't going to stop being Americans overnight, and neither will you. Just something to think about. Every decision we make is either supporting a very unfair, unpleasant status quo or helping to create a new one. So, I said no to the jeans. We'll find something fair trade or gently used before next year rolls around, and the kids will make their wardrobe last until then.

Free Burt's Bees Toothpaste

2010-02-08T18:24:00.000-08:00

All I can say is right on. Get your free toothpaste here.

Yes, We Can...

2009-12-14T08:00:00.000-08:00

...afford to eat better.

The professor in my argument class this quarter decided that our main focus should be health care because of the timeliness of the issue. Like we can't just flip on the television and hear about that--but whatever. We had to write several essays related to health care and have class-wide discussions on it.

My first essay focused on why our health care costs so much--more than twice what it does in other industrialized nations, in fact. The answer seems to be that we are sue-happy and, more important, very unhealthy due to a really crappy diet. Obesity and related problems create up to half of our national health care bill. That's not counting things like type 2 diabetes that are closely tied to but not entirely caused by obesity.

My second essay discussed how we can change this. I said that if we are really serious about it, we need to treat junk foods like another famously harmful substance: tobacco. According to my research, the average obese person has health care costs far exceeding a smoker. So why are we serving junk food in our school cafeterias? Why can people buy chips and soda with food stamps? Why don't we tax these foods and make them illegal on school campuses?

My teacher wrote a note on my paper suggesting that most Americans can't afford healthy foods. And I say: Yes, we can.

Convenience foods cost more than whole foods per pound, and they seem to be the culprits in our expanding waistlines. People think that dollar menus are cheaper than cooking, but are they really? Sure, it's hard to beat one dollar for a burger, but no one is getting fat from that two hundred calorie burger. They are getting fat from a larger, three or four dollar burger, along with two dollar supersized fries and a large Coke. A single value meal is around six dollars, about the cost for a healthy homemade dinner for your whole family.

People in third world countries eat better than we do and have lower rates of diet-related disease, because they can't afford our crappy diet. Americans have more expendable income than most Europeans, who also manage to eat better. Anyway, whole foods are cheaper than Frankenfood if you look beyond out of season pomegranates and radicchio. So it's counterintuitive to suggest that money is the issue.

I think time and laziness are the issue. I'm not saying fat people are particularly lazy, but that we all are in this country. Some people are blessed with metabolisms that can handle all the extra calories and the sedentary lifestyle, others are not so lucky. And none of us feel like dedicating an hour to cooking in the evening, although many of us do it anyway. It's easier, albeit more expensive, to just open a box. And therein lies the problem.

We do have the money--beans and rice are cheap. We do have the time as well, for the most part. Most people feel like they have no time, but when their favorite TV show comes on, suddenly time is in surplus. We spend time on the phone, time shopping for things we don't really need, time waiting in fast food lines. It's only when it comes time to throw the beans in the crockpot that we get all short on time. Suddenly we don't have even a minute, unless that minute is spent in a McDonald's drive-thru.

If you aren't working, or even if you are, you have time--as much or more time than I do, at least. We can eat healthy. Yes, we can. To borrow another famous tagline: just do it.

There are a few caveats here. If you are feeding yourself on less than $5 a week, then you will be relying on ultra-cheap, ultra-unhealthy foods like ramen. But you won't get fat... you'll have a hard time just getting enough calories to survive. Obesity comes from eating too much--way too much--for a period of years, not from spending a few tight months eating from a Styrofoam cup. Also, organics do cost more. But you won't get obese from eating a conventionally grown apple.

In one of our class discussions, a girl said she and her one year old live on fast food because she is too busy as a single mother to cook and she can't afford better food anyway. But she gets her nails done every week and has a constant flow of new clothes and Coach handbags. She has time and money to shop and watch someone airbrush her nails. Just not the time to eat healthy.

It's not her fault, either. Every time you turn on the TV, some expert is claiming that Americans are fat because we can't afford the money and time for a healthy diet. People are being encouraged to make unhealthy choices and told that they have no control over something as basic as what they put in their mouth. But we all have the choice. We all have the option to eat well. Say it with me: Yes, we can.

Part-Time Homeschooling

2009-12-13T08:00:00.000-08:00

I completely believe in homeschooling. My children never learned so thoroughly nor developed socially as well as they did when we were a work at home/learn at home family. Going back to college only reinforces my belief, because the top students in every single one of my classes are fifteen-year-old homeschoolers who shame the rest of us with their ability to learn.

Not only are they better students, the homeschoolers at my college are a refreshing change from the kids near their age. They dress more modestly, are better spoken, and fool around less in class. Many of my non-homeschooled classmates have difficulty relating to people in the class who are older than them or from different ethnic backgrounds. They stay in their own enclaves and giggle while the homeschoolers seem to socialize with a variety of people, and at more appropriate times.

I'm sure this is a generalization. I'm sure there are many mature and well-taught public school graduates and many immature and academically unprepared homeschoolers as well. However, this generalization has been true 100% of the time in the last year and a half of college. Which worries me, because my kids are now attending conventional school.

As I said above, I believe in homeschooling. On the other hand, something that I didn't consider when I married an older man is that at some point, I would need to pick up the financial workload. My husband is about 15 years away from retirement while I am in the middle of my childbearing years. When he reaches senior citizen status, we will still have children in the home and need to provide more than a retiree's lifestyle. We can save for that time, but these savings will barely put a dent in the financial needs of our future. Going back to school seems like the only realistic option, but it definitely infringes on the lifestyle I feel called to.

I decided to make a list of the things I feel my kids are missing out on by attending 'real' school and attempt to address them one by one.

1. Lack of appropriate socialization. What I hear over and over is that homeschoolers don't get socialized; however, my experience is just the opposite. They do not spend all day in a small room with people their own age, but is that really preparation for the future? On the other hand, they usually accompany their parents on daily errands, sometimes even go to work with them, as well as volunteering, going to lessons, and attending mixed age co-ops. My kids saw more of the community when we homeschooled and seemed more socially aware.

My solution has been to involve my children more in the community now that we are in school. I have taken them to school with me on occasion so they see what other kinds of formal education look like, and we are always looking for volunteer opportunities. We continue to take various lessons and try to maintain our friendships with adults and children of different ages and backgrounds.

2. The moral and ethical void of public schools. Wow, if my kid comes home with the words to another Black Eyed Peas song memorized, I am going to scream. When you send adults into the world, they have the foundation to deal with it; when you send children, their foundation is unset and prone to taking imprints you may find unpleasant.

This is honestly the hardest issue to overcome. We have a character building program that I bought while homeschooling, and we continue to use it. I am much more restrictive on television viewing than I was when we homeschooled. We take time for morning and evening prayers, and I emphasize moral and religious values at every opportunity. Is it as good as homeschooling? Nope. Is it sufficient? For now, yes, and when it stops being sufficient we will stop being public schoolers.

3. Materialism and emphasis on appearance. I used to love it when my friends came over with daughters in princess costumes. The clothing children wear to co-ops ranges from mismatched rags to thoughtfully created designer ensembles, and every variation in between. It doesn't seem to affect the social sitch at all in that crowd.

This is a hard one to combat at schools because no one wants to have their kid be the one ostracized because the parents take a stand on principle. My fourteen-year-old is willing to take that stand on his own: he'll dress however he wants, and everyone can take it or leave it. But he is a product of homeschooling, while the younger ones are more impressionable. I will buy new garments when needed provided they meet standards of decency and are within a certain price range. We do a lot of this at thrift stores, and I alway point out the waste involved with so many people buying and then getting rid of perfectly nice, stylish, name brand clothing. The result is that the younger kids seem to feel that the name-brand game is a little silly, but necessary if you want to get along, and something to be begrudgingly worked around. Which is exactly how I feel.

As for the constant need for stuff, I know that many public school parents will buy their kids the foods and toys seen on television. I believe that a constant pursuit of stuff is wrong, and I show it through my actions. We also purchased the Veggie Tales film, Madame Blueberry, which addresses this behavior in a more interesting and less preachy way than I can.

4. Bullying and victimizing behavior. It's the nature of many children and adults to try to gain power however they can. Honestly, the way we dealt with bullying in the homeschool community was for any adult present to step in and stop it, then report the incident to the offending child's parents. Believe me, no one seemed to have trouble doing this. If anything, many parents seemed over-sensitive to it. Public schoolers, on the other hand, are supervised at recess on about a 1 adult to every 100 children ratio. They can't see and intervene constantly. They have these bullying assemblies, but my second grader could not even define bullying after the last one. It wasn't a semantic issue; she honestly had no idea what it was except that it was very mean and bad.

Luckily, we have a large family, enough that everyone here has been on both sides of mild variations of bullying behavior. So they can see that it is mean and how bad it makes others feel. My kids are pretty empathetic, so this small amount of experience goes a long way. We talk a lot about how important it is to be friends with the kids standing alone at the perimeter of the playground and to include anyone who wants to play.

5. The lack of an education. Isn't it ironic that so many parents send their kids to school to get an education? Yet that seems to be conspicuously absent. They barely get in their three R's and the occasional science or social studies unit between announcements and crowd-management. We did that the first hour of the morning when we homeschooled, then had hours for social studies, history, science, art, archaeology, religion, and dance lessons. All before noon, usually. By the way, my kids go to one of the highest rated school districts in our state. They are getting the best education available in American public schools.

I quickly identified the shortcomings of the school and have taken measures to overcome them. The elementary school we go to is good at teaching math, and pretty good at handwriting and reading. They make it as boring as humanly possible, but my kids love to learn so it doesn't really phase them. They read and write voraciously, so I haven't ever had to teach or police that, even when we homeschooled. That leaves the other things on the list, and I continue to do our Sonlight curricula minus the math and phonics to make up for this. We still take the occasional day off for museums. I have even taken members of the brood to school when we were learning something relevant to our other lessons. One of my teachers worked in Antarctica and gave a slide show on it; I brought Grace because of her obsession with penguins, and she talks about it still almost a year later.

So, I think we have the bases covered, for now at least. The secret to part-time homeschooling is to view the school as a flawed adolescent babysitter. Watch, listen, overcome the shortcomings that you can, and remember that you can always scrap Plan A and go back to homeschooling if need be. I miss my homeschooling mommy friends and the joy of watching my children's faces light up when they finally got it, but those are selfish desires that I can deal with alone.

Christmas Wishes

2009-12-12T09:20:00.000-08:00

With finals over, I am finally free to rev up for Christmas. We actually have most of the shopping done, but there is decorating and general festivity to be done. However, my biggest gift this holiday is a 'B' in physics.

To clarify, I am usually a solid A student, but this one subject has been kicking my backside. I already had a B in Physics, but the final was scary in a 30% of our final grade kind of way. So when I saw that it hadn't had a negative effect on my grade, joy is probably an understatement for the way I felt.

What does this have to do with the holidays? Delayed gratification. It's something that our Santa Claus culture celebrates in words and disdains in actions. Right now the message everywhere we go is "don't you want....?" The impression I get from most of my non-homeschooling friends is that they feel compelled to buy their children every item on a long wish list of toys. For the record, I think this will have a long term negative effect, especially on their physics grade.

Being a college student, especially a pre-med student, requires a grasp of delayed gratification. How frustrating is it to do the same problem over and over, ending up with the wrong answer every time, until at last you have worked through the bugs and get it right? We have about twenty problems like that for homework every single week. No wonder over half of my class was gone before finals week. Modern life is about getting what you want as easily as possible, right? And Christmas is a frenzy of this attitude.

What will my children do if they want to be a doctor or a dentist or a lawyer? Will they be able to put in hard work with the reward deferred for a decade or so? A lot of young adults now can't seem to put in the two years necessary to get basic training for a skilled labor job. They don't even want to start at the bottom at a normal, every day job. Remember how Jacob worked seven years to win the hand of Rachel, only to have his father-in-law switch out his daughters? Jacob worked another seven years to get the wife he really wanted. That's a little extreme, but it stands in sharp contrast to modern men who expect sex on the third date.

I don't want my children to end up unsuccessful because their desires aren't handed to them in a pretty wrapped box. I want for them to want, and work, and associate the hard work with the eventual success. I want them to know what intellectual hunger feels like. I want for them to decide what success means to them and then to pursue it wholeheartedly.

On the other hand, I think that never getting what you want is disheartening. Not to mention that our society preaches that only naughty children don't get showered with gifts on this one special morning. So here's how I have been handling it: one present from parents, one from Santa Claus, and a stocking of fun but useful things including a little candy. They get many gifts from aunts, uncles, and grandparents as well, so it's hardly an austere existence.

I try to make sure that at least one of those gifts is their heart's desire, whatever that happens to be. Because I'm not into buying toys outside of major holidays (it severely limits their ability to have fun making homemade musical instruments with cardboard), this hardly seems excessive. This year, wish lists in my home include blocks, erector sets, bicycles, and some new-fangled cupcake-only version of the Easy Bake Oven. These are things that Santa is happy to buy.

These are things that my children have wanted for months, so imagine their joy when their wish is at last gratified. The world waited thousands of years for Christ, so waiting a few months for a new bicycle doesn't seem unreasonable. This patient waiting will come in handy should any of them decide they want to be a doctor.

Things You Know About Me, Things You Don't

2009-10-17T22:20:00.000-07:00

Throughout the last twenty-four hours or so, I have been questioning why I was so initially freaked out when my doctor said he had read my blog. I think it's because I felt like he must know me better than I had realized, which throws me a little off guard. However, this lead me to another train of thought. Different groups of people know different sets of facts about me, and I always feel like that is a bad thing, which is a topic I have blogged about before. For instance, my blog readers know that:

1. I am against many forms of traditional medicine. Especially the so-called preventative care. I treat immunization schedules and treatments for routine illnesses with what many might call reckless disregard.

2. I am 'green', even obsessively so. I hide my crunchiness well, so unless you read my blog, you probably don't know.

3. I have a ~~bitchy~~ ironic sense of humor and like to make fun of things that don't make sense to me.

4. I hang out clothes, grow food, patch worn clothes, and generally enjoy a third world lifestyle.

What is the impression I give my doctor, my professors, my children's teachers, the public at large? That I am ultraconventional, put-together, etc. It's not like I try to lie, just that I think people take you more seriously when you don't look like you crawled out of a dumpster and you don't debate everything they say. So if you read my blog, you see a hidden, more subversive side of me. But you don't see the whole picture; for instance, people who see me in person know that:

1. I get embarrassed easily and will blush deep scarlet and even get shaky when caught off guard. Like yesterday :-).

2. I am a little obsessive about purses and shoes matching, etc.

3. I am a veritable well of useless knowledge. For instance, I know the details of how various flu epidemics have killed people. I just like epidemiology (shrug). I also know what all those weird nursery rhymes mean--most have a dark past and were written about very situations going on in the world at the time. And lots of random stuff like that, things that get pulled out in somewhat related conversations.

4. I am kind of a perfectionist.

Here are some things you probably don't know about me, whoever you are:

1. I am ambivalent about almost every controversial topic. There are people who can see both sides and decide on one. I see both sides and get confused. Because it usually comes down to security vs. liberty, personal rights vs. the common good, etc. And I like both.

2. I am secretly intimidated by cool people. Not Hollywood cool, but people who really have an identity and do neat things. What do I do that's really cool? I can't think of anything...

3. I am an obsessive science nerd. Probably how I learn all those random facts.

4. I don't believe in complaining about children. They know when parents do that. They sense it. And it bothers them--at least, it bothered me when I was little. As for my own brood: suffice to say, they are all cute and generally healthy and generally well behaved except for a few age-appropriate issues that we are working on together. I love them all and would have more if my uterus would cooperate.

See what I mean? I'm like a multiple personality or something. Should I work on becoming more normal? I kind of like my quirky, weird self, though. At least I'm never bored.

Blogging gets results (?)

2009-10-16T20:47:00.000-07:00

If you are my doctor, it's okay to keep reading. I'm not freaked out by you reading my blog. I just didn't expect it to be brought up at an appointment. I was caught off guard, but it's really kind of cool when I think about it.

If you aren't my doctor, I had a doctor's appointment today. He told me that he had come upon my blog and read my one of my various complaints about his staff and shown it to them. It was a lot easier to get this appointment, as I blogged a few days ago. So maybe blogging gets results.

Here's where I confess that I am a big fat liar. When my doctor said that he read my blog, I immediately assured him that my blog was a small thing that I write for family and friends and venting pruposes. It may have started that way, but I have a lot of readers now that I have never met. So there: I am a big, fat (unwitting) liar. But if my doctor is reading this, he's a big fat liar too. Because when I starting hyperventilating when he said he read one of my posts, he said he would never read my blog again if it made me so uncomfortable.

I was uncomfortable--epic understatement. I wrote that post one and a half years ago while in the aftershocks of seeing my normally healthy oldest child almost die, and I never realized it would come back around years later. I didn't know what I had written, but now that I've re-read it, I stand by what I said--it was totally honest. Albeit one-sided. I can only really show one side here: mine. Blogs are about personal experience, and I've only experienced my life.

So, whoever you are, doctor or not, I am officially giving you permission to read, and, no, I didn't mean you are really a big fat liar.

For the rest of you, it was the normal thing plus a little bloodwork to try and nail down some of the symptoms that those of you who see me in person are tired of hearing me whine about. No biggie, hopefully.

The End of Doctor Drama--Can It Be?

2009-10-14T08:00:00.000-07:00

The last time I saw my doctor, he assured me that they were overhauling their scheduling. So patients could actually get appointments, and little stuff like that.

Last week I had to make not one, but two appointments. One a routine appointment for me, and one just to make sure my youngest daughter's flu wasn't swine flu (it was, btw, and she's already over it). In both cases, I was able to make an appointment. Rachael had to see a resident, but whatever, I needed an appointment that day so I couldn't be choosy. Last time I called, I couldn't see anyone or anything there in the next week, and they didn't schedule beyond that. The appointment for me was schedules two weeks in advance--that's right, no 'We're full this week, so call back next Monday'.

The staff seems generally nicer as well. Could it be that they were just as dismayed by the old system? Now the doctors are in 'teams' sorted by color, which is a little fourth grade for me, but I got an appointment so WHATEVER.

N.P. in a C.P. World

2009-10-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

It always seems to me that there are two camps: the natural parenting group and the conventional parenting group. When I read the c.p. magazines like Parents, I am a little appalled at the cavalier attitude toward kids. Like they are swine flu and I need a checklist to manage them. On the other hand, I don't really fit in with the n.p. group anymore. I am in school too much to homeschool, and as a result my kids sometimes have to do things they don't want to do, just like their mommy. My dryer is running at this moment, proving I am not the uber earthy mom I once was.

Still, I find myself applying n.p. principles to c.p. problems. Like:

A. Mornings. I was reading a c.p. magazine the other day and it had a big article on having smooth mornings. Most of the tips could be filed under: be a drill sergeant/Nazi/total meanie that your kids will cry about in therapy someday. Here are a few of my tips:

Rub backs and kiss the rounded cartilage-y part of their ears.
Make something really yummy for breakfast--they will come.
For teenagers, start their shower running, then wake them. Even my 14 year old won't waste hot water.
Do everything you can the night before, like picking out clothes, packing lunches and backpacks, etc.
Have fun morning traditions that no one wants to miss. Grace plays violin in the morning, and sometimes we make pictures for their bus driver if we have time.

No spray bottles of water and they still get out of bed? Indeed. Here's another c.p. magazine favorite: toddler tantrums. According to Parents, I should respond to a display of emotion by isolating the child in a homegrown version of solitary confinement and putting a stop-order on parenting them until they agree to stifle their rage, or at least put it aside until I'm not looking. Instead, I:

Give choices. Toddlers get mad when people make every decision for them, because they have just realized that 1. they are a separate human being from everyone else and 2. everyone else seems to be deciding what to wear, eat, play with, etc. Don't let them jump off the roof, but I think they can handle picking out shoes even if they end up wearing play shoes at the mall or even a mismatched pair.
Help verbalize emotions. Like, "you don't like it when we have oatmeal for breakfast? I'm sorry, that's what we have. You can choose to not eat it, but you'll be really hungry by snack time." Sometimes they just have something to say and it is too complex for their vocabulary.
Hug them a lot. I mean, they're two. I sometimes feel like screaming and I have sixteen times as much life experience through which to filter the whole confusing mess that life can be. If my two year old gets a little overwhelmed, it's understandable.

Here's one not from a c.p. magazine, but from a c.p. teacher. She is a little peeved because my daughter keeps reading books outside her assigned level. Either too hard and the second grader does poorly on the little computerized test they take on the books they read, or too easy because even if she reads at a fourth grade level she still likes second grade stuff like ballerinas and unicorns. So I pull out my best n.p. skills and:

Tell the seven year old to read whatever she wants, that the tests are totally unimportant compared to the fun of reading, and that the teacher can call me if there is a problem with that.
Send the teacher a letter politely expressing the above. (she never called)
Encourage the seven year old to at least look for a book in her assigned level before getting one that is technically too easy or too difficult.
If she isn't feeling like she understood the book well enough, we can read it together or she can just not take the test. Whatever, if the grade is that important, just don't take the tests unless you are confident you can ace them.
Look at the library for fourth grade level books about ballerina mice and girls who live in forest groves with unicorns.

Just because you are forced to live in a c.p. world, that doesn't mean you can't be a n.p. parent. If anything, I think it's easy to be the perfect earth mommy when you control your own sphere, but being a n.p. parent while surrounded by every random bit of insanity the planet can throw at you... well, that's an art form.

Woman kicked off plane for breastfeeding?

2009-10-11T00:59:00.000-07:00

Yep. Here's the link.

Okay, so she was asked to cover up and didn't. Maybe she was hot. Maybe the toddler was stressed out by the change in schedule and didn't want a blanket over his or her head.

If you are sitting in the window seat in the back of the plane, with only your husband next to you, you kinda think that you can skip the blanket regardless of what the control freak flight attendant says because anyone who doesn't want to see your mammaries would have to crane their head to see them anyway. My youngest had this thing against blankets when she was breastfeeding. She would play 'peek-a-boo' and the blanket ended up covering nada. This was a real problem in my hood--the mommies at our homeschool co-op would enshroud themselves in the break room even though it was just us girls. I think the blanket is unnecessary, because anyone with a little decency would simply look away.

I breastfed the same child on a plane on the way to California. And back. And to Colorado, and back from there too. The abrupt change in elevation hurts little ears and the sucking alleviates it. 'Lap children' have to be in your lap anyway. Maybe the mommy in question was trying to get the toddler to sleep before the plane took off so she could chill with her Ipod during the flight.

Who cares why? She should be able to feed her kid the food that God intended for them. Doesn't this seem like a violation of civil rights? We have to be so sensitive to everything and everyone now, but harried mothers and their toddlers don't count?

This was probably all the complaining flight attendant saw:

How You Like Them Apples?

2009-09-10T15:18:00.000-07:00

They aren't just for dessert and snacks anymore!

We have an apple tree that blesses us with more apples than any reasonable family could eat. They're great for snacks and really unhealthy desserts, but I am always looking for a way to incorporate them into actual meals. Here are two super awesome and reasonably priced recipes that I found at the most unexpected place: Williams-Sonoma.

Puffy Apple Pancake

Ingredients:

1 small apple--I made ours with THREE and it was very good
4 tablespoons granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
3 eggs, at room temperature
1 cup milk, at room temperature
3/4 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 tablespoons confectioners sugar

Directions:

Preheat an oven to 400°F.
Grease a 9-inch glass pie dish with butter.
Peel the apple, then cut it into quarters and core. I have one of those nifty apple things that does it for me. Using a small knife, cut the apple quarters into small chunks.
In a small bowl, using a fork, stir together 2 tablespoons of the sugar and 1/4 teaspoon of the cinnamon. Add the apple chunks and toss with the fork until the pieces are evenly coated with the cinnamon-sugar. *NOTE* If you use more apple, you'll need more sugar and cinnamon as well.
Pour the apple chunks into the prepared dish, spreading them out evenly with the fork. Set aside.
In a blender, combine the remaining 2 tablespoons sugar, the remaining 1/4 teaspoon cinnamon, the eggs, milk, flour and vanilla. Put the blender lid on securely and, holding the lid down tightly, blend on medium speed until all the ingredients are well mixed and frothy, about 1 minute. *ANOTHER NOTE* I did this part by hand. I think it took less time than getting out the blender and then washing it and putting it away.
Put the dish in the oven and bake the apple chunks for 5 minutes. Using an oven mitt, carefully pull out the oven rack until the dish is visible. Do not remove the dish.
Pour the batter evenly over the apples. Slide the rack back into the oven and close the oven door. Bake the pancake until puffed and brown, about 25 minutes.
Using oven mitts, carefully remove the dish from the oven and set it on a wire cooling rack.
Dust the pancake with confectioners sugar using a fine-mesh sieve. Cut into wedges and serve immediately. Serves 8.

Once you've had apples for breakfast, why not have them for lunch as well? I made these sandwiches and they were good enough that I am no longer dreading eating apples three or four times a day for the next month and a half.

Peanut Butter and Apple Sandwich

Ingredients:

2 tablespoons whipped cream cheese
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon honey
1 Granny Smith apple
2 tablespoons peanut butter, preferably all- natural
2 slices sandwich bread

Directions:

Put the cream cheese, vanilla and honey in a bowl. Using a fork, mash together until smooth.
Put the apple on its side on a cutting board. Using a sharp knife, cut the apple in half lengthwise. Then cut each half in half again to make quarters. Lay each quarter on its side and cut away the tough, papery core and seeds. Cut each apple quarter lengthwise into thin slices. *Again, I use the apple machine for this. It takes like twenty seconds to core, peel, and slice one apple!*
Using a table knife, spread the peanut butter on one slice of bread. Spread the cream cheese mixture over the second slice of bread.
Cover the peanut butter with a layer of apple slices, and top with the second bread slice, cream cheese side down. Press down lightly. Cut the sandwich in half or into quarters with the sharp knife and serve immediately. Ignore small children begging for a bite. Makes 1 sandwich. You'll need a lot more than that!

One Girl's Green Wardrobe

2009-09-09T09:20:00.000-07:00

Does 'back to school' have to be expensive or bad for the environment? My seven-year-old eco-fashionista doesn't think so! Here are a few ways your kids can be paragons of style without compromising their values or your finances.

Buy Organic

T-shirt by Born On Earth, which is a new brand that makes children's clothing from organic materials. It's all made in Southern California, so you don't have to worry about oppressing people in the third world. If the shirt doesn't look brand-new, it might be because Grace has worn it at least five times since the company sent it to us (thanks, guys!). I tried to convince her to save it for the photo shoot... no luck. So you can see that it washes and line-dries well! We have gotten so many comments (especially when we went to Seattle last weekend... it was a real showstopper in Pike's Place) on this shirt because of the cute graphic on the front and the little details all over it. Check it out...

This tee has a modern, fitted cut and it's long enough to cover what low-rise jeans don't. If your little ones also happen to have been born on earth, you might want to check out their website.

Organic, fair trade clothing is more expensive than what you would pick up at Target, but it is well worth it. Take for instance, Born on Earth. The products are 100% organic with water-based inks. They plant one tree for each purchase through a partnership with Trees for the Future. Even their tags and bags are 100% recycled and recyclable. You'll be able to afford at least a few key pieces from green clothing makers if you fill out your wardrobe with the ultra low-cost options that follow.

Recycled Clothing

The outfit above is entirely from freecycle. The shorts are faded, but I think that's back in style now. The shirt was a boy's stained white t-shirt. I sun-bleached it to fade the stains and then tie-dyed with bright colors. The result is a beautiful, wearable piece of art that Grace helped make.

There are many sources of free clothing. First, freecycle and the free section of Craig's List. Second, hand-me-downs. Make it known that you take hand-me-downs and you'll start getting offers. Most people would love to have another mom to give their children's cast-offs to, but they are afraid to offend someone by offering.

Speaking of free clothing, the shirts below are from freecycle as well. Little girls can't wear thin-strapped tanks alone to my daughter's school, but they are cute and modest when layered to cover stains and worn spots in other shirts. I made the skirt--isn't it adorable?

Support your Favorite Cause

Grace cares deeply about the plight of endangered animals, so when she saw this shirt at the Bellevue Mall, she had to have it. We were even more thrilled when when we found out that one dollar from every tee goes to the World Wildlife Fund. You can get this shirt at Justice, which is in most major malls now. If you don't have one near you, there are also eco-themed tops at Cafe Press. Check out the bee green Kids Hoodie.

DIY

What can you do with really pretty toile curtains from the Goodwill that don't look right on a single window in your home? If you're a hippie mama like me, you can trace your daughter's favorite jumper onto newspaper, adding a half-inch all around for hems, and use that as a sewing pattern for a stylish jumper. This is a super easy project and the only costs are the curtains (99 cents) and the thread (pennies).

As you can see, procuring a school wardrobe without trashing the planet is attainable and even easy. Just remember to Recycle (by passing on your unneeded clothes and accepting hand-me-downs from others), Reduce (as in reducing the social and ecological impact of your new stuff by buying organic and fair trade), and Reuse (mend, tie-dye, and repurpose to get the maximum use out of every item).

Here's a game for my readers: of all the shoes Grace owns, only one pair was bought brand new. Can you guess which? The choices are: brown flats from first picture, gold sandals, or black tennis shoes. Leave a message with your guess and I'll tell everyone next Monday.

Solar Power

2009-09-08T09:05:00.000-07:00

I'm in the middle of a huge writing project on solar power, which means I can't say much about it without plagiarizing myself. However, I can say this: I never realized how do-able making your own solar panels can be. There are a lot of options I have run into while researching my project that seem totally possible, even with my limited skills. I am especially interested in recycling broken solar panels--recycling and carbon-neutral power are two of my favorite things.

My children are really into this concept also. We've done a few solar science projects that have only whet their appetite for more. So, I am tossing around a few ideas right now. I'm thinking about trying to sell this as an article for a major magazine or a feature for a major TV show. After all, how many families decide to build their own solar panels?

I'll be sure to report back here when I have my thoughts on this a little more organized. Oh, and check back tomorrow for my ultra-green back-to-school post. I have made some cool stuff and even procured a few samples from the latest green kids' clothes companies.

Alternatives to Driving

2009-09-05T11:49:00.000-07:00

Rising gas prices have led to a flood of articles on saving gas dollars, but most of them focus on things other than actually reducing your time on the road. Here are a few ways I am reducing my driving time.

1. Get to know your public transportation. If you aren't in a major city, it probably sucks. As in: it will take you twice as long to get anywhere. However, this is something that you can get used to. Consider: time that you drive is generally wasted time. You are not accomplishing anything. You are not making meaningful interactions. You're just burning fuel. When you are riding the bus, you can talk to your children, teach homeschooling lessons, make phone calls, pay bills, balance your checkbook, read a book, crochet Christmas gifts, mend socks, etc. The bus may take more time, but unlike driving time it can be productive.

2. Choose one or two days a week that you will drive. For us, it is currently Friday and Sunday. Friday is my errand day; Sunday is church day. I occasionally fall back on the car on other days for birthday parties, lessons, etc, but having two official driving days makes me really avoid driving on those other days.

3. Cut back to one car. It's easier than it sounds. My husband and I have always shared a car. In his old job, our kids walked to school and he took the car. I simply did without a vehicle during the ten or so hours he was gone. If I needed the car, I would drop him off and pick him up, but this wasn't really efficient. Later, when our children began going to a school farther away, my husband took our kids and some neighbor kids to the school on his way to work and the other mom picked them up after school. She thought she was getting off easy because she didn't have to get up as early.

My husband's job for the last several years required some driving, so his company provides one for work days, which eliminates the need for this kind of planning. It's made me lazy, but I'm trying to improve. When we homeschooled, I was getting really bad about spending all day in the car. I restricted my gas budget to $10 per week, and this helped me prioritize my driving.

Cutting back to one car is not just an eco-friendly decision, it is an economically positive one as well. Half the insurance, half the car payments, etc. Similarly, driving less will also save money. It's the way the rest of the world lives, and it's a decision that will probably be forced on us by finances in the near future. As Americans, we need to get used to the idea that oil isn't the answer to every problem.

Get Your Free Kashi Cereal...

2009-09-04T08:00:00.000-07:00

...here!

I love it when healthy food is affordable, and you don't get more affordable than free. These samples usually come with pretty decent coupons, so if you like your whole grain cereal you can get another box for a low price.

The Joys, and Trials, of Freelance Writing

2009-09-03T08:00:00.000-07:00

As much as I love being able to make a living from home, there are a few things that bother me about freelance writing. Most of them fall into the following categories:

Repeat Work: Repeat jobs are like a so-so gift handed to you in a beautifully wrapped package. Don't get me wrong; I want those repeat jobs, because they make up a decent percentage of my living. However, I find it hard to write on the same subject indefinitely. Last year I wrote so much about soccer that I am now an expert despite never having donned a jersey. Right now I am doing my fourth job for a design agency, writing about (you guessed it) design. I feel guilty for being so tired of both topics.

If you are a client, yes, I still want the repeat work.

Random Ratings: At one agency I work for, both the customer and an employee of the agency rate each complete job. The customers here are invariably positive, but the employees are harsh. One gave me a low rating for misspellings, but I was supposed to write the article using misspelled keywords. It was to take advantage of people misspelling things in search engines. This is not an uncommon search engine optimization strategy, so the employee should have known--and they would have if they had read the directions I was given like they are SUPPOSED to.

In another ratings snafu, a client accidentally rated me too low on Elance. They didn't understand the parameters of the scale. Their written evaluation is nothing short of gushing, but because few people leave reviews this one negative number rating has lowered my six month satisfaction rate from 100% to 75%. Ouch. These low ratings affect my ability to get other work, so it's very concerning.

I don't mean to complain about a job that has been nothing short of a blessing, but like all jobs it has its frustrations. If you want to join me in wondering how much you could possibly write about logo design or , here are a few links to places where you can get money for freelance writing:

Textbroker
Elance
Go Freelance
Squidoo

Really? Boycotting Whole Foods?

2009-09-02T12:24:00.001-07:00

I guess some people aren't as tolerant as they like to think they are.

The founder of Whole Foods--you know, the place I wish I could afford to shop and sometimes do anyway--recently wrote an op-ed piece for the Wall Street Journal. He didn't say anything controversial or extreme. He points out that there are a lot of problems with socialized health care in the countries that use it (like 1.8 million people currently on a waiting list in Great Britain for hospital care while we Americans could walk in any day of the week and get pissed off if we had to wait a few hours) and offers a few common sense alternatives.

In response, Democrats want you to boycott Whole Foods. A Facebook site has been set up completely misrepresenting what was written in the article (read the article at the link above and then visit the site to see what I'm talking about. It's pretty egregious). Some are even calling for people holding the stock to sell it so the price will go down, maybe taking the company with it.

I believe strongly in exercising your rights as a citizen in one of the first and last free speech/free economy nations on the globe. However, trying to destroy a company and the people who own its stock--a company that pioneered the free trade and organic movements, no less--because the founder calmly and respectfully expresses his opinion about a political issue and offers his ideas for a better solution... it seems very closed minded and intolerant. Extremist, in fact.

Why the vitriol? Is there no room for debate in the health care 'debate'?

Quantity vs. Quality

2009-09-01T12:27:00.000-07:00

There is an artisan cheese store called Beecher's that I like to visit in Seattle. For just $20 or more dollars per pound, I can get mouthfuls of organic, homemade, local dairy pleasure.

People always give me stunned looks when I mention how much I will pay for certain food items. After all, in the US we like our food cheap. Because I am more frugal than most, my secret love of artisan cheese just doesn't add up.

I think the artisan cheese is actually a fine economic choice when you consider a few things. It is way healthier than most cheese. The grass fed cows and sheep produce milk with omega whatever acids and lower levels of bad fat. No hormones and garbage either. Dollar per dollar, I'm getting less calories but more nutrition, which is imperative with my fat jeans getting tighter by the millisecond. Plus, the cheese is rich and flavorful enough that I can eat it at a rate of about one bite per day. Last night my husband and I crumbled a little dry jack on our polenta. Today we'll mix some gorgonzola into a homemade vinaigrette.

Americans eat way too much food but spend less than, well, almost anyone in the world on groceries. This is because we are always looking for the cheapest way to get a plate full of meat. We aren't willing to buy legumes, and we won't pay more even if the better nutrition justifies it. We can afford to eat conventional meat and dairy in massive amounts because both are heavily subsidized by the American government. Healthy options, not so much.

We don't just east the wrong food, we eat way too freaking much of it. A typical French croissant is 1 1/2 ounces. An American Sara Lee croissant is 3 1/2 ounces. In Mexico, they use 5 inch tortillas to make quesadillas. Here we use ten inches. In most of Europe, the largest container of milk you can get is 1.5 liters. That's less than half a gallon. In other countries people eat better, but they eat way, way less. That's why we are the fatties of the planet.

We don't just eat more than other countries, we eat more than we used to. Here is a graphic depiction of fast food serving sizes now and just twenty years ago:

Personally, I think the government should tax unhealthy food and use that money to subsidize organic fruits, vegetables, legumes, and whole grains. Maybe even make them free. Then I could feel like I am doing something magnanimous whenever I bust out the Cheetos. Plus, it would eradicate the need for food stamps, the school lunch program, and various other bureacracy- and waste-ridden programs. Anyway, if we are going to make socialized health care work, we will need a healthier population to keep the whole bloated barge afloat. Healthier diets is one step closer to that utopia we all want to live in.

Most people need to eat their ideal weight times ten calories per day. So, for an average American female, 1200-1300 calories per day. Wow. That's less than half of what most of us eat.

If you eat half the food, you'll be buying half the groceries. It leaves a lot of budgeting room for things like artisan cheese.

Back to School... or not

2009-09-01T11:13:00.000-07:00

One week ago, I took my son to kindergarten. Now, for many people, this is something to look forward to. One less toddler in the house, one more starling out of the nest for seven hours a day. For me, it's a reason to cry into my dishwater. I have VERY mixed feelings about school.

We used to send our kids to private school. They received an excellent education in a very moral atmosphere. However, the families at the school were wealthy, that California type of wealthy with Hummers and McMansions and $300 jeans. We were one of few exceptions. I didn't want my children to be teased or rejected for not having what their peers had, so I pieced together designer wardrobes from thrift stores and made sure they opportunities to earn the key items their friends had. Yet I had very real reservations about the whole scene. The materialism permeated the experience, and even interfered with the moral education that was my reason for sending them there. Paying tuition as well as keeping up with the Joneses became way too expensive when multiplied by several kids, so we turned to charter schools.

Our charter school was geared toward science and math. It catered to gifted students, but... not enough. The kids were bored for much of the day after years in a top private school. Luckily, we were accepted to an even more challenging Latin charter school that required this hellaciously long application process. The day after we received the acceptance letter, we found out we were moving to another state. One without California's wide range of charter schools.

That led me to homeschooling. It was a magical two-plus years. I never dreamed I could find so much inner joy spending the day with a house full of small children. To discover new information with them, to see their faces change when they finally 'get it'--it's priceless. It feeds your soul. Homeschooling was an amazing experience, but an insular one. The kids wanted to branch out. And, to be honest, so did I.

Now we are in public schools. The kids are exposed to some questionable ideas, especially the high schooler. We discuss these things as they come up, and he has appeared to be ready for most of the challenges public school poses. At some point, we all must live in this terrible world of ours. His most scandalous moments have involved another homeschooler, so I can't blame that on the evil world. Because we live in an excellent school district, the education is sufficient, even by my lofty standards. Everyone is involved in honors and gifted programs that will prepare them for successful lives.

But that could change tomorrow. I'm just nor feelinf bought into public school. As a matter of fact, I feel excluded by it and vaguely jealous of my children's teachers. They get all day with my awesome kids. Do they know how lucky they are? How cool my children are? What lovely souls they have? I doubt it. As soon as this schooling arrangement doesn't work, we're outta here. We are tentatively back to school. Today at least. Tomorrow... ?

My schooling philosophy? I will do whatever it takes to get these kids an exceptional education, moral and otherwise. We are partners in this path, so I take their feelings very seriously. It's THEIR life. THEIR education. If they become unhappy with their current schooling situation for legitimate reasons, we will change it once again.

Negative Peer Pressure and Green Moms

2009-08-31T15:15:00.000-07:00

Do you ever find yourself feeling like you need to hide exactly how green you are?

I certainly do, especially when we have houseguests. I put away the homemade cleansers so no one sees that I don't use the commercial antibacterial stuff. I make 'normal' meals, like meat tacos. I buy packaged foods for my cupboards. If asked, I describe my blog as a 'family' blog.

None of the words for people who embrace an ecofriendly lifestyle have positive connotations: hippy, crunchy. My personal favorite comes from a Chemistry classmate: "You are so granola." From there, it's all downhill. Activist, dirty, extremist, nutcase.

My houseguests are without exception wonderful people who would accept any weirdness I threw their way, but I feel the need to put on a show of how conventional I am. People have been trained by the media to think that our disposable lifestyles are cleaner and safer than the alternative. I don't want to have to sound like a perpetual Sierra Club ad and I don't want anyone to think they are going to be attacked by germs if they use my toilet. So I buy individually packaged granola bars instead of making my own and put the homemade laundry soap in an old Tide box.

People should feel guilty for not hanging things out, for not reusing, for pouring anti-bacterial crap into our waterways. Instead, I blush when the kids ask for falafel or when freecycling comes into the convo. I feel a little shame at cleaning with vinegar and old rags. wtf?

From now on, it's no more Miss Nice Mommy. My house is green, but it is as clean and comfortable as any other. It's time for all of us green mommies to be proud of who we are and what we stand for!

And I thought I was green...

2009-08-22T09:13:00.000-07:00

I'm reading a book on urban homesteading and really digging the idea of being off the economic grid. I started searching for sites to help me along and found this one. The website is published by a family of four that lives almost entirely on products grown or otherwise created on their small city-sized plot in Pasadena. It's like the city version of Barbara Kingsolver's Animal, Vegetable, Miracle. I hope they are as inspiring to all of my friends in the blogosphere as they are to me!

Fun Lunch Ideas

2009-08-19T10:52:00.000-07:00

When I homeschooled, we relied on leftovers for lunch. Leftover meat could be rolled in a tortilla and baked to make taquitos, or I could throw together a salad and serve with slices of cheese. I didn't have to plan for lunch. Now, however, with everyone in school (including me), lunch is a little more complicated. Modern parents can't rely on the schools to provide a healthy lunch, nor can we send the traditional PBJ in this allergy-prone era. Here are my solutions:

1. The Leftover Wrap. I keep whole wheat tortillas in the fridge--they stay good forever, it seems--and I use leftovers to make healthy, tasty wraps for our lunches. The only potential problem is sogginess, but there are ways to solve this. First, spread something thick and water resistant on the wrap before filling, like cream cheese, hummus, or a nut butter. Second, use hardier veggies, like cole slaw mix, broccoli, or cabbage. Thicker leafy vegetables work too--think chard, spinach, and kale. From there, just add a filling, fold, and enjoy. You can get really creative with wraps! Our favorite right now is hummus, red curry chicken, and shredded cabbage. Don't knock it until you've tried it!

2. Cheese and whole grains. This is the easiest lunch solution, and my kids are almost guaranteed to eat it provided we haven't had it for lunch all week. I slice cheese and send it with whole grain crackers, whole grain toast, or just about any whole wheat grain. Whole wheat pitas can be sent with spaghetti or pizza sauce and shredded cheese for DIY pizzas. Kids love cheese, so be creative and you might be surprised at what they will eat.

3. Chopped fruits and veggies with protein dips. These can include hummus, which is super cheap when homemade with the recipe at the bottom of this post, or nut butters. Earthbound Farm sent me some individually packaged organic carrots and apple slices that were so good we couldn't manage to save any for when school started. If you go to their website, you can get on their mailing list and get coupons for delicious, healthy products sent to your home. With or without coupons, these still cost less per ounce than packaged chips, and the nutrition is clearly superior. I'm not fond of things that come in individual packages, but this company uses recycled materials, which takes some of the guilt out of this easy, busy-morning solution.

4. Pasta Salads. Mayo-based salads are a breeding ground for dangerous bacteria, and not even really healthy. Oil based salads, on the other hand, are safer and healthier. Simply start with whole grain pasta boiled as directed--they give a kick of healthy fiber and don't get mushy--then add your child's favorite crunchy vegetables chopped into bite-sized pieces. Complete with a protein, like nuts, beans, or crumbled cheese, and mix with olive oil and spices to make a yummy pasta salad.

Any of the above main courses with a homemade snack (like pumpkin bread or peanut butter cookies) and a fruit or veggie will make a frugal and green lunch that your kid is very likely to eat instead of trading for a Twinkie. If you have any fun lunch ideas, email me or leave a message. I'm always looking for kid friendly lunch ideas that are tasty enough that I can bring them to school as well.

Easy Homemade Hummus

1 can garbanzo beans, drained

1/4 cup lemon juice

1 clove garlic

1/2 cup tahini

salt and pepper to taste

Put all in food processor or blender and process until a paste forms. Refrigerate until ready to enjoy.

Hamburger Heaven

2009-08-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

I try to use as little meat as possible, but hamburger has two things going for it: it's cheap, and it's versatile. Whether you buy half a grass-fed cow from the local farm or follow the sales, if you are like most households, hamburger is a staple.

I reduce the environmental impact of hamburger by stretching it as far as it will go and by serving it on rushed nights when our only other option is fast food. I buy hamburger when it is on sale and process it in the following manner:

1. Determine the weight of the hamburger and measure out one-quarter that weight of dry TVP. Hydrate the TVP by mixing equal volumes of hot water into it and letting set until absorbed. Then, add to the burger.

2. While you're at it, throw in a few handfuls of dry oatmeal, barley, or bulghur. Crackers and bread work as well if you have some you need to use up. The point is to add fiber with whatever you have around the house.

Adding protein and fiber not only stretches your hamburger, it lower the overall fat percentage and makes it more filling. I then add some finely chopped onion and garlic, because we like those in all of our hamburger recipes.

3. Make your recipes and freeze them. You might have your own favorites, but here are some of mine.

Meatballs two different ways (if you are going to make these, get the sauces started and cooking on the stove before doing anything else)

Take the mix mentioned above and add some of your favorite spices (mine today had about a tablespoon each of dill and rosemary) and an egg or two. Roll into balls and brown in a pan over medium heat. Do this in batches so there is only a single layer in the pan at any time.

As they finish browning, add half to each of the two sauces: spaghetti sauce and one other. I seem to get good spaghetti sauce on sale for less than it would cost me, so I just use jarred. The second sauce is made with whatever I happen to have around. If I have mushrooms, I make Swedish meatball sauce; if I have the stuff for homemade BBQ or sweet and sour, I make one of those. Let them simmer for an hour or so, then put in separate ziploc or freezer containers.

Easy Mini Meatloaf

I add two eggs for one large-family batch. Work in, then add your choice of spices and some kind of tomato-based liquid. I use about one cup for the aforementioned large-family batch. I like to play around with spices--adding taco seasoning for the spice and leftover salsa for the tomato, or spaghetti sauce for the tomato with extra garlic and oregano. I then put a handful or so in each well of a large muffin pan and top with a layer of the same tomato product. You can then either bake the whole thing at 350 until done, then taking the meatloaves out of the pan and freezing; or wrap up the whole pan and freeze raw, to be cooked another day.

Browned Meat

The rest gets browned and frozen in meal sized portions to be added to tacos, casseroles, or whatever inspires me.

In a normal hamburger session, I spend less than two hours of cooking to get six meals: two meatball, one meatloaf, and three browned beef. One days that are overbooked, I take out a package and put it in the refrigerator in the morning. For the meatballs, you can thaw overnight and empty the bag into the crockpot in the morning, leaving it to simmer on low until you are ready to eat.

All of these meals are faster than a pizza and much cheaper... I hope they make your busy life a little easier!

Dealing with a Stiff...

2009-08-05T15:08:00.000-07:00

...basket of laundry. What did you think I was going to say?

No one wants to wear scratchy underwear. I understand that, believe me. This is the number one argument against hanging out clothes, but you can fix this problem with relative ease. There are two ways I deal with this:

1. Add a cup of vinegar to your rinse cycle. The vinegar smell will be gone before the clothes even dry, but for some reason it makes them softer. Some things, like blue jeans and towels, still need a little help.

2. Put clothes in the dryer with a damp dishtowel for a few minutes. I know the point is to not use the dryer, BUT using it for three minutes beats using it for forty-five.

Some things, like crisp cotton, need ironed anyway. That takes care of the stiffness. I don't consider it a waste of electric because I iron those items even when they are dryer-dried.

Laundry: the new way vs. the old way

2009-07-30T08:00:00.000-07:00

Whoever said the only certain things are death and taxes must not have been in charge of the laundry in their home. In my house, it is absolutely a certainty that I will have to do some laundry related chore every day.

Because laundry is both universal and constant, the way we do our laundry can make a huge difference. There seem to be three different schools of laundry thought:

The Old-Fashioned Way: Most people don't do their laundry the truly old fashioned way--agitating and wringing it by hand--but there are still many people who make their own laundry soap, use natural fabric softeners like vinegar, and hang out the wet clothing to dry. I generally fall into this category, although I have been known to (gasp) buy laundry soap when time is short. I also use my dryer in the winter when the temperatures are below freezing.

The Cheap Way: These people use conventional washers and dryers and conventional laundry products. Obviously in the United States, this group makes up a substantial majority.

The Neo-Hippy Way: This crowd is not into extra work, but they are willing to be a little more green by spending some green. You know them by their state-of-the-art front loaders in museum quality colors. They tend to use Method and other greener cleaners. I'm not picking on these people; my parents and some of my best friends are among them.

Which is the greenest way? I think we can all agree that the middle route is the most wasteful in terms of water and electricity use. Between the old fashioned way and the neo-hippy way, well, it's hard to say. If you buy the front loaders because you sincerely need new machines, they aren't such a waste, but if you actually got rid of perfectly functional traditional machines to buy them, well, there's nothing green about that. No, the savings in water and electric don't even come close to the environmental cost of manufacturing that machine or transporting it across the globe. And when it comes to drying, even a front loader can't do it as cheaply as the sun.

The problem with laundry soap, chemical-free or not, is that it contains a lot of water (which is heavy to transport, thus requiring a lot of fuel) and must have packaging. When I make my own, none of my ingredients come in a plastic container. That alone makes it leaps better than the most eco-friendly detergent on the shelf, although I am not above buying them when being a full-time student/full-time worker/full-time mom leaves me without the few minutes it takes to throw together my own.

It's not that I'm hooked on standing in the heat dodging bees (allergic here!) while hanging heavy wet laundry on a line. It's just that I love it when the green decision is also the cheaper one. I never could pass up a great deal like that. Hanging out laundry and making my own soap cut my laundry expenses down to a few dollars a month for a whole lot of people. That makes it worth my time.

A little change in laundry habits can make a huge difference! Don't be afraid to try a new way and see if you can add one more green habit to your repertoire.

Modern Housewifery and the Green Movement

2009-07-29T08:00:00.000-07:00

There was a time, just a century ago, when a typical housewife burned up to 9000 calories per day. They were up before dawn cutting wood for the morning fire and carrying water in buckets from a far-away well. Making pancakes for breakfast required collecting eggs, milking cows, and grinding wheat. I consider myself a productive person, but I don't accomplish in one day what these women did before their families even woke up.

The other day, I was reading one of my favorite homemaking sites. I realized that, unlike housewives of other times, the main duties of a modern hausfrau are cooking and procuring/managing goods. Sure, I clean, go to school, take care of my kids, and work when I can. However, the things that occupy much of my time are cooking, baking, organizing stuff, and making decisions about what new stuff my family needs. Like most women, like most modern people, I am not a producer. I am a consumer.

Americans are consumers on a mass scale, and that is why our food and consumption decisions are so important both politically and environmentally. It seems frivolous to micro-analyze every little decision, but those decisions will determine the type of consumer I am. Is local, organic lettuce worth a dollar more? Should I throw away my daughter's jeans with the blown-out knee, or can I find a way to make them wearable? Is it worth my energy to pick through thrift store racks when an organized Macy's is across the parking lot and doesn't cost a whole lot more? A lot of my life, and a lot of this blog, revolves around these seemingly insignificant choices.

In the end, my food is going to have a greater impact on the environment than my choice in cars. My decisions on what to buy will have a bigger effect on child labor in the third world than my voting. If you want to make a difference in your future quality of life, every consumer decision matters. Is it worth sweating the small stuff? I think it is.

Slow cooker sausage and beans

2009-07-28T08:00:00.000-07:00

What's not to love about a slow cooker? There's nothing like coming home from a busy day to find dinner is already made. However, most crockpot recipes are not very 'green'. They tend to be meat-heavy and to use a lot of (expensive and unhealthy) processed foods like cream soups and canned beans. I have had to develop my own repertoire of crock pot recipes, and it has been well worth it! Here's one new recipe:

Slow Cooker Sausage and Beans

Ingredients:
· 2 cups dried beans (I like to use a blend, like 1 cup pintos, 1/2 cup black beans, and 1/2 cup kidney beans)
· 4 to 6 links organic chicken sausage or other link sausage
· 1/2 cup chopped onion
· 1/2 cup canned tomato sauce
· 1/4 cup barbecue sauce
· 3 tablespoons brown sugar
· 1 teaspoon chili powder
· 2 tablespoons prepared mustard
· Salt and pepper to taste
· 1 can (8 ounces) crushed pineapple, undrained

Preparation:

Soak beans overnight (I soak mine in the crockpot to cut down on dishes). Place in slow cooker on high with water to cover, plus a few inches. Cook until soft, about 4 hours in my crockpot. Longer is okay, too. Drain beans, reservings about one cup of fluid. Add all other ingredients, along with the reserved fluid, and cook in the slow cooker on high for another hour. Serves a medium sized family. If I need to 'expand' the recipe, I increase everything except the sausage. Organic sausage is expensive!

Monday Menus

2009-07-27T14:38:00.000-07:00

This week I found organic chicken sausages on clearance at Safeway for $1.99 per package. This led me to develop some fun ways of using them in this week's meals.

Sunday: Pork ribs, potato salad, canteloupe

Monday: Slow cooker sausage and beans, spinach salad

Tuesday: Super baked potatoes (with cheese, chives, and of course, sausage), honeydew melon

Wednesday: Slow cooker 'baked' ziti with marinara and sausages, green salad

Thursday: Spinach, garlic, and cheese omelets, corn salsa

Friday: Roasted veggie sandwiches on ciabatta, I'll throw what's left of the sausage on there if any's left, roasted potato wedges

Saturday: Black bean/multi-colored pepper fajitas, spanish rice, miscellanous fruit salad

Recipes to follow!

Guest Blog: Bill Hawthorne on Green Living and Health

2009-07-25T20:00:00.000-07:00

Green Living: Improving Health Today and Tomorrow

Much attention has been paid in recent years to what seems to be a growing environmental conscience in the United States. Going green used to be considered expensive and a luxury for those who could afford the trend. Now it appears that we are learning that not only is adopting more environmentally conscious attitudes good for our economic situation, but also our….health?

Yes, if we dig a bit deeper we can see that dirty industries and backwards policy is actually harming the health of the earth for our children and the health of her inhabitants today.

How Does Environmental Policy Affect Public Health?

There are two levels of health consequences associated with dirty industry, both direct and indirect. The direct consequences are examples like increased asthma rates in areas with high smog indices. Chlorofluorocarbon release into the atmosphere has shown to decrease the filter of direct sunlight on the planet, resulting in more concentrated ultraviolet light reaching the surface of the earth. Perhaps it is no surprise then that in countries with depleted atmospheric gas, skin cancer rates are among the highest in the world.

The indirect health consequences are harder to see immediately, but closer examination reveals that these are, in fact, perhaps the most hazardous. Bi-products of dirty and backwards industries, such as coal and oil processing, include cancer causing substances like asbestos and benzene. A U.K. study conducted in 2002 indicated that coal and oil industry workers are at a much higher risk of developing mesothelioma (associated with asbestos exposure) and leukemia (traced to benzene and heavy-metal exposure). Dr. Valerie Rusch among many other doctors who specialize in this area understand that these are substances that can be directly traced to antiquated pre-regulation equipment in industries whose environmental hazards are even more inherent.

Can we really afford to continue on the path we were on before? Investment in clean industry means not a healthier planet for our children and grandchildren, but also a healthier place for us to live today.

--June 25, 2009 Written by Bill Hawthorne with the maacenter

Duck! The Boomerang's Returning!

2009-07-24T08:00:00.000-07:00

You don't have to duck. Just me. Because, yes, two of my older kids are returning home for a while. Due to real estate situations, their apartment is no longer available (or it won't be in a few weeks at least).

I love that they feel comfortable enough with me to fly back into the nest when times are tough. I love that I am still their step-mommy, even though one of them is literally two of me. On the other hand, things are getting a little crowded in the Sage Mommy home, and the last time they both lived here, our electric was like twice as expensive.

Here are a few tips for dealing with not-empty-enough-nest syndrome:

1. Make them chip in. Luckily, my kids both have jobs, so I plan to charge them whatever is a reasonable amount of rent for one-third of a bedroom (yeah, we'll be back to three in a room :-O ) plus electric and such.

2. Make them do chores. Lots of them. As I recall, older kids can double the housework load with their constant snacking in the living room and excessive towel use. I'm already making their chore lists. Now that they are adults, their to-do lists will look more like mine than before.

3. Repeat after me: "this is not a frat house". I don't know what went on at their old house, but I have an imagination. And none of it will be happening here. This is a family home, and only traditional morals are allowed. No girls, no monkey business, and any kegs will be confiscated to be later shared with the cooler members of the local homeschool community. You know who you are.

Can WalMart Ever Be Green?

2009-07-23T08:00:00.000-07:00

They think they can.

I'm not an eco-perfectionist, and I'm not going to pick on WalMart. We've all heard it before, and they must be doing something right because millions of people still work there and millions of people still shop there. However, I think even the most devoted WalMart shopper would balk at calling them green.

Consider: nothing gets to a WalMart without being carted over thousands of miles of blacktop. That's if it didn't have to be flown here before hitting the trucks. That $4 t-shirt may have more miles under its belt than Ferdinand Magellan.

Consider: undercutting local companies until they die away, then jacking prices up once there is no alternative is the WalMart policy. It's not an accident--it's how they operate.

Again, I'm not hatin'. Obviously millions of people approve, and that is their business. However, Wal-Mart is now trying, at least superficially, to 'go green'. They offer a range of 'green' products. Okay, I don't know exactly why a plastic bottle of toxic cleaning chemicals is now green--maybe that's its actual color. WalMart also is stepping into the realm of organic cotton products and other popular green accoutrements. It doesn't make them green; it makes them aware of the issues of their times.

However, they are actually leading the green movement in one arena: labeling. The way some stores label healthy choices, WalMart is going to start labeling green(er) choices. I don't know exactly what will make something a 'green' choice among the many choices in those crowded aisles, but if it gets more everyday people to buy into environmentalism, I guess it can't hurt anything.

one is silver and the other gold...

2009-07-22T08:00:00.000-07:00

...make new friends and keep the old. So goes the song, at least. Making friends is something I seem to do without trying, and I love it. I love having a posse. I'm not even a particularly outgoing or interesting person, but I seem to collect interesting people the way some people collect those naked little troll dolls.

Anyway, I recently threw a birthday party for my daughter, inviting two 'old' friends and one 'new'. It was really a revelation to me, for two reasons:

1. I am a totally different person in different social situations, and it is never so obvious as when I try to 'blend' friends from different settings. At school, where New Friend met me, I am edgy, sarcastic, and brainy. I dress in trendy clothes and make fun of things. My California coastal accent creeps back. My homeschooling friends, on the other hand, usually see me with kids, and thus they see the quieter, gentler Emily. The one who wears long skirts and talks in grammatically correct sentences. I never realized I encompassed these two very different Emily's until I was standing at my daughter's party at a total loss as to how to act. Is this normal? Maybe it is a reaction to the stark contrast between an academic setting and a more kid-friendly environment.

2. At some point, Mrs. Hannigan and Mrs. March, along with a handful of others, became 'old friends'. There was a point when my group of friends in Redding were the 'old friends' and the homeschooling mommies were nice people I hang out with because my friends are so far away. However, now they are not just friends, but 'old' friends. (Notice the quotes--none of you need Botox or anything. That's not what I mean by 'old'.) Anyway, I've became close to a handful of really cool women here, despite the fact that we never see each other and we have very different backgrounds.

This brings up interesting questions. What makes someone an 'old friend'? Is it going through trauma?--those of you who have been reading here for a while know what I mean by that. Is it that they are interesting enough that I wonder how they are doing even when we don't see each other? Who knows. I'm probably the luckiest person on the planet when it comes to meeting awesome people.

The other question: with student Emily being so different from mommy Emily, both of which are different from career chick Emily, what will Dr. Emily be like? How many more personalities do I have lurking in there?

I Don't <3 Papaya

2009-07-21T08:00:00.000-07:00

Maybe I've just had bad luck, but every papaya I've tried has been kind of gross. Even my kids won't eat it. I'm not too hot on papaya flavored things, but they don't repel me the way the real fruit seem to. Am I doing something wrong? Is there a secret to making papaya pallatable?

Monday Menus

2009-07-20T20:16:00.001-07:00

Locally, we are getting out of the greens and berries phase of late spring. Farmer's market stalls are full of a huge and colorful range of vegetables as well as every fruit you can imagine. Now is a good time to incorporate those veggies into stirfries, pasta dishes, and quiches, and serve every meal with a plate of sliced local fruit. Being green has never so easy!

Sunday: (instead of Sunday dinner, as we returned late from visiting Thomas the Tank Engine in Snoqualmie) Banana whole wheat pancakes with miscellaneous cut up fruit

Monday: Kung Pao chicken with pan fried vegetables and noodles, sliced papaya

Tuesday: BLT's and watermelon. Whole grain bread, of course. That makes the bacon and mayo healthy, right?

Wednesday: Red Curry chicken with stir fried vegetables and rice

Thursday: Vegetable quiche with homemade ciabatta and sliced fruit

Friday: Pasta primavera with leftover ciabatta made into garlic bread, green salad

Saturday: Hot dogs roasted over our fire pit, along with chips, marshmellows, and fruit salad

Following Your Passions

2009-07-14T23:51:00.000-07:00

I just thought I'd throw it out there. Even if you are a mom, you should have a few passions, a few happy thoughts you can carry in your heart when the laundry piles are high or you're trying to figure out how you will buy this week's groceries with the negative sixteen dollars you have left in your budget. This weekend, I decided to indulge one of my passions. I've been a fan--a full-blown, trivia-reciting fan--of Tori Amos since I heard her for the first time eighteen years ago. This weekend, I finally made it one of her concerts. I feel so refreshed, like I can face my life again. Here's the song that was one of the highlights for me. I wish I had a recording from my exact concert, but this one will have to do:

If you don't know what exactly your passion is (no, husband and kids don't really count), find it!

Cheap and Healthy Dinner: Dal

2009-07-08T17:52:00.000-07:00

Tonight I made dal (an Indian lentil dish) and naan for dinner. It was so good, and I think it's because I inadvertently used a new recipe.

I usually make dal with a recipe that includes various curry spices, like cumin, turmeric, and ginger. Today, I realized I was missing a few key spices. Rather than run to the store, I subbed a little red curry paste. So here was the recipe, all three ingredients:

'Haven't Been to Fred Meyer in Weeks' Dal

1 cup red lentils
3 cups water
1-2 tsps red curry paste

Simmer until done.

Now, wasn't that easy? I served with homemade naan and sauteed chard from my mother's garden. Altogether, it was less than three dollars for my huge crew. Super healthy too! Just make sure your significant other likes the smell of curry, because red curry comes out your pores. I rather enjoy it, like an exotic perfume. :-)

Jon and Kate's Big Announcement: My Theories

2009-06-19T15:06:00.001-07:00

By now, everyone with cable has heard that there is a big Jon and Kate announcement coming this Monday. I've been boycotting the show for a while, but based on what I've seen on the supermarket tabloid racks, I have a few theories on what these two plan to spring on us.

Kate plans to get rid of the dogs and instead use her super-sized property for a chicken farm. Between camera shots of Kate feeding the chickens, they will be cared for by one of the children’s nannies or her hottie-biscotti bodyguard. She will claim that she was inspired after noticing that her backward mullet looks surprisingly like a chicken’s tail end, and call the farm “organic” despite feeding the fowl a mixture of Juicy Juice, Lay’s potato chips and Domino’s pizza.
The house is so big it feels empty with just ten. This has inspired Kate to invite some family friends to visit—the Octomom and her brood of 14.
After being fined by the EPA for a garbage output that rivals that of a small European nation (Jon has to use his tractor to take out their weekly trash--no joke!), the Gosselin family will begin using real plates and cups.
The Gosselins will be homeschooled beginning this fall to accommodate their sixty hour per week filming schedule. Kate wants to use one of the Duggar girls, but Jon knows a local 23-year-old teacher who would be perfect for the job.
In yet another crossover special, the guys from The Deadliest Catch show up with a crabbing boat for each Gosselin kid.
Because former sponsors Gymboree and Baby Gap have been scared off by the scandals, Hot Topic will now be providing the children’s wardrobes. Maddy spends the show choosing between black and navy blue lip gloss, while the sextuplets run amok in coordinating AC/DC t-shirts and Converse All Stars with glittery skull appliqués.
And, in a perfect world… Jon and Kate have decided to quit the show and live comfortably for the remainder of their children’s youth on the millions of dollars they earned last year. They claim that their marital problems combined with the children’s increasingly bad behavior led them to realize that they need to refocus their lives. They move quietly to another area and lead simple, happy lives.

What do you guys think? Are Jon & Kate tacky enough to broadcast a separation or divorce? Is TLC? Will companies sponsor this (except Hot Topic LOL)? Heaven forbid, are they going to show the parents breaking it to their eight children?

Life Doesn't Suck Thursday: All Done with Doctor Drama?

2009-06-18T08:00:00.000-07:00

Those of you who have followed my blog for a while now have heard probably more than you would like about how much my doctor's practice sucks. Doctor D. is an awesome doctor... once you get past his staff of snarling hyenas. Honestly, if you were going to design a system with the express purpose of denying health care to sick children and adding more distress to a worried mother's life, CWFM would be the place to consult, because they do a world class job of both.

I occasionally *mention* to Doctor D. that I am frustrated with his system. By *mention*, I mean that I bring it up at every opportunity. Anyway, at the last visit, he asked why I had waited so long to bring in a sick child (who ended up in the ER). I told him it wasn't for lack of trying. In fact, I tried for over a week before the problem became worthy of an $800 trip to the nasty, germ-laden ER in the middle of prime swine-flu season. He told me that this was going to change, and soon, because they had hired a new office manager who was re-vamping the scheduling system.

Can you say YYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY????????

Honestly, would it be inappropriate for me to bring my new hero a bottle of wine or some homemade cookies? I am so excited. Because, this was the appointment where I was going to tell him I could no way see him anymore, great doctor or not. And now, I can avoid being doctor-less in this medically underserved area. Thanks, God.

Super Yummy Banana Bars

2009-06-17T08:00:00.000-07:00

Okay, folks, there is NOTHING healthy about this sugar and butter-rich recipe, but it's so good you frankly won't care.

Banana Bars with Vanilla Cream Cheese Frosting

Preheat oven to 350 degrees and grease a large pan, 10x15 inches or so.

To make bars, combine:

1/2 cup softened butter

1 1/2 cups sugar

2 eggs

8 ounces sour cream

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

In a separate bowl, mix:

2 cups flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 tsp baking powder

1/4 teaspoon salt

Mix the dry ingredients into the wet ones. Then, add:

2 medium ripe bananas, mashed

Bake at 350 degrees for 20-25 minutes, until a toothpick inserted near center comes out clean. Cool and then frost with this awesome frosting.

Mix:

1 8 oz package softened cream cheese

1/2 cup softened butter

2 tsp vanilla

3 3/4 to 4 cups powdered sugar

Frost the banana bars and enjoy. Store these in the fridge if possible... it's a lot of dairy for room temperature.

Children and Summer

2009-06-16T09:28:00.001-07:00

For homeschoolers, summer means little change except that random people no longer ask the kids why they aren't in school. For families with children in traditional school, summer is a massive upheaval. I was looking forward to spending more time at home after our first year in school, but most of the parents I have talked to don't share my sentiment. The two main reasons seem to be an increase in work for the mother, and dealing with sibling bickering.

I won't comment on the state of a society where mothers don't want to spend time with their children. Instead, I'll offer a solution that I have found effective in dealing with both messiness and bad behavior: work.

Free time is a wonderful part of summer, but everything has a time and a purpose... and a limit. Here's how you know your child has too much free time: they complain about being bored. They have time to pick fights with siblings, create mischief, and make a nuisance of themself. They don't enjoy very much and seem way too jaded for their young age.

My children in the summer are expected to do about 20 minutes per year of age in work and 10 minutes per year of age in schoolwork. An older kid should have a volunteer endeavor or a part time job, because you will quickly run out of chores for them unless you live on a farm. So, my six year old has an hour per day of mandatory schoolwork and two hours of chores. I split them up, but she is responsible for: making her bed, picking up her room in the morning, helping me with whatever chores I do that day, picking up in the family room in the evening , clearing the table after dinner, and loading the dinner dishes in the dishwasher. Similarly, my five year old does about 50 minutes a day in schoolwork and 100 minutes a day of chores. Even my thirteen year old works. Schoolwork is no trouble at all; after the tedium of traditional school, our homeschool curriculum is challenging and interesting enough to feel like a game.

Many people are shocked by the idea of putting kids to work. They think it is child slavery. Honestly, it's good for them. It puts the rest of their fun little lives in a proper perspective. The only way to learn a work ethic is by actually working, so I am preparing them for the adult existence that will constitute the majority of their years on this planet. Plus, I can look forward to spending time with them. They are literally no trouble at all; they make up for the extra work of having a house full of children, and they don't have the chronic boredom and dissatisfaction that have became an institution in modern childhood.

Monday Meal Plans

2009-06-15T11:49:00.000-07:00

Sunday:
B: Banana whole wheat pancakes
L: Crackers, cheese, cut-up raw veggies
D: Kung Pao Chicken, brown rice, watermelon

Monday:
B: Lemon poppyseed muffins from a mix, watermelon
L: Organic boxed macaroni and cheese, baby carrots
D: Greek crockpot chicken and couscous, the rest of the watermelon--it's HUGE!

Tuesday:
B: Cold cereal with milk, bananas and sliced strawberries
L: Pasta with tomato sauce and a sprinkling of parmesan, fruit from fruit bowl
D: Italian grilled cheese (it's just grilled cheese but with mozzarella, tomato, and basil instead of plastic cheese), salad

Wednesday:
B: Banana bars with cream cheese frosting
L: Broccoli cheese baked potato
D: Vegan red beans and rice, salad

Thursday:
B: Yogurt and honey toast
L: Cajun wraps (basically the red beans and rice from night before sprinkled with a little cheese and grilled in a flour tortilla)
D: Crab legs (on sale at Rosauer's!!!), rice pilaf, corn on the cob

Friday:
B: Cold cereal, oranges
L: PBJ and chips--on Fridays, we do errands all day and have a picnic at the park for lunch
D: Israeli eggs, whole wheat toast, cassava melon

Saturday:
B: Whole grain waffles, what's left of the cassava
L: Thai noodles (whole wheat noodles mixed with a sauce made of warmed chunky peanut butter, soy sauce, and lime juice, then topped with chopped green onions and peanuts), baby carrots
D: Green peppers stuffed with spiced brown rice and ground beef, garlic bread, salad

Are You Ready to Go Back to School?

2009-06-15T11:44:00.000-07:00

With the economy being... what it is... many moms have told me that they are thinking about going back to school. Granted, it is almost a guaranteed way of increasing your income as well as your ability to compete successfully for work-at-home jobs. Nor is it un-doable; you would be joining me and probably millions of other mothers on the same path. However, there are a few things you should consider before enrolling for classes.

1. Do you have time? A full time student takes at least twelve, but more realistically, 15 units. That translates roughly into fifteen hours per week in class. Well, I can carve that out of my schedule... you think. However, don't forget studying (3 hours per week for every unit, so 45 hours per week on average), transportation, the inevitable gaps between classes, and time spent in financial aid and registration lines. Don't kid yourself; going to school is a full time job and then some.

2. Do you have your house in order? If you are leading a disorganized life, you should focus on that before moving any of your energies outside the home. Do you have a reasonably organized home? Are your kids happy, healthy, and on some semblance of a schedule? Is your life as streamlined as possible (ie, you aren't grocery shopping three times a week to grab things you forgot)? Your household will need to function on autopilot occasionally to accommodate finals week or research projects, so don't head back to school before your family is ready.

3. Are your spouse and children supportive? Mind you, supportive can have different definitions for different people. My husband thinks it's super cool to have a smart wife and even cooler that we'll be able to retire comfortably thanks to my future income. However, I began to get annoyed a month or so into my first quarter when he didn't pick up a little more of the housework and childcare. It doesn't take Mother Teresa to help with the dishes when your wife has been in a lab for four hours. And a lot of my friends have husbands who help out around the house. It took me several months to get over myself. I have always done those things, and it isn't fair to change the rules a decade into our marriage. On the other hand, my kids have been more than eager to do a few extra chores, especially since this leaves more time for me to spend with them. Before you go back to school, make sure your kids are on board and your husband is at least going to tolerate the upheaval.

4. Do you know what you will do with your kids? If you are a homeschooler, do not assume your kids can homeschool themselves or each other while you go to class. And don't forget the little ones; they need not just a babysitter, but a situation where they are nurtured and loved. I am not against high quality childcare, but anything less will not be good enough. Many colleges have childcare programs that are top-notch and made to accommodate a student's schedule, but they still cost money (lots of it). If you live in a highly rated school district, as I do, dealing with older children may be a little easier, but don't expect them to get the education they would receive at home. In our case, the younger kids go to the college center and the older kids go to school, then homeschool to "fill in the gaps" on weekends and over the summer.

5. Do you have the money? Even community college has a staggering cost, and you will be spending roughly twice the tuition when you add in books, supplies, fees, transportation, and the occasional lunch. Apply for scholarships and financial aid early and then see if you can swing the difference. I do not recommend getting a student loan for your bachelor's degree. The amount you make with a bachelor's degree is low enough that your family will not come out ahead for several decades once you add in childcare, work costs, and a higher tax bracket. If you plan to work through your master's or doctorate--which is the only way going back to school would financially worth it in this job market--save the loans for graduate school, which is more expensive and has much less financial help available.

6. Do you have a plan? I would love to major in linguistics, but my passion for language will not pay the bills. Instead of thinking about what you like to study, think about what you like to do. I would love to be a doctor, so I am majoring in Biology, which will give me the solid foundation I need to get into medical school and excel there. After all, I'm not getting a degree for bragging rights; I am being purely practical. The only way college will be worth it for a mom is if a highly paid and flexible profession is waiting at the end of the long, hard road. Do yourself and your kids a favor by making a realistic plan.

7. Internet or traditional? Most employers and graduate programs consider a degree from one of the internet colleges advertised on television worth far less than one from a traditional brick and mortar university. Plus, the online ones cost more. However, many traditional universities offer internet courses and even entire internet degrees. Your degree won't show what format you chose for your classes, so this is the best of both worlds. In my case, although my major requires time in the classroom, I am learning to work my schedule around so I do at least one and maybe even two quarters per year on the internet.

I don't mean for this to be discouraging, not at all. I am glad I made this huge decision, and I think my family is stronger for it. However, I wish someone had told me a year ago what I was getting into. My advice: do the research, crunch the numbers, work out the cost/benefit analysis, and figure out a realistic plan before jumping in.

You Really Want These People In Charge of Your Health Care?

2009-05-29T07:25:00.001-07:00

My husband and I are in the very beginning stages of adopting three children from foster care. The kids are relatives of mine and currently living with another family member who cannot keep them permanently. This will be a win-win situation when/if it goes through, but until then it's an emotional nightmare. Dealing with dependency courts and the adjoining social service agencies is like dealing with the legal system of a foreign country, one that

My husband and I are not allowed to speak in court or have a lawyer speak on our behalf. Actually:
We aren't even allowed to be in the court during hearings. And even outside the court:
The social worker is not allowed to talk to us about the situation. In addition:
We are not allowed to talk to the children about the situation. Even when they ask us. They would like to know what's going on as much as any other person would, so they DO ask. Until then:
We have to drive nine hours each way once a month to visit them to maintain the bond that will make us their top adoption candidates when/if they need adoption candidates. And on our three weekends off:
We have to prepare our house to hold these three children, fence our above ground, completely inaccessible pool, and buy a huge van before we will be considered as candidates for adoption. Remember, they won't tell us anything about whether said adoption is even a possibility. Except what we need to buy. That's because:
The ultimate goal is to reunite the children with their emotionally disturbed parents at all costs. In 6 to 18 months, that goal will change suddenly in a court hearing I am not allowed to know about or attend. Then we can begin another long, scary process:
Out of state foster care adoption. The social worker says it requires an immense and maybe impossible amount of paperwork. All in the best interest of the children, but he likes to remind everyone that there is a limit to what he can do. This might be just short of that limit, or beyond it. And then he remembered that he isn't legally allowed to discuss anything and clammed up. If you still don't think it's a scary, precarious process, consider:
One of the children is still in a state foster home because the wheels that turn the justice system sometimes get stuck. She is honestly just waiting for the right things to be filed, and the worker will be out sick this week, and his supervisor is on vacation. Whenever they get around to it, this infant will be reunited with her brothers and the extended family members who care for them. Right now, she is literally lost in the system.

Adopting children is a great, green way to enlarge your family, and foster care is full of children who need families. It's just the 6-18 months of labor pains that bring me down sometimes.

Encouraging Others

2009-05-28T18:09:00.001-07:00

I met a new homeschooling mom this spring, one who has somehow stayed under the radar and managed to have a full, homeschooling social life without belonging to our local homeschooling organization or even hanging out with anyone who does. Another story for another time. Anyway, she was telling me that her house was so messy her mother-in-law was coming to dig her out. She's pregnant and super busy, so a messy home was to be expected, but her willingness to have someone see the mess was what amazed me. "I don't even pretend to keep a perfect house," she told me. "Keeping up a facade is too discouraging to others."

What an epiphany. Personally, I do my best to hide the fact that my house is messy on a regular basis, that my children eat (organic, of course) macaroni and cheese for dinner when I am cramming for a chemistry exam, and that we have even had to wear each other's socks at times for lack of clean ones of our own. I tend to think people would judge me if they saw these moments, that they would think less of me.

In all honesty, I think I'm not giving my friends enough credit. Only a jerk would look at a pile of clean laundry and think bad things about me, and my friends are not jerks at all. When I see glimpses of these realities in their lives, I usually feel relieved: I'm not the only one???

So, I figured I would encourage you all in my friend Heidi's spirit. Today, instead of telling you about my successes, I'll tell you about my failures. I got 77% on a chemistry test because I mistakenly thought I understood the difference between a paramagnetic and diamagnetic complex; I am making taco casserole for dinner because my stove and counters are covered with goldfish apparatus; my to-be-folded laundry pile is so substantial that my kids don't even look in their drawers for clean underwear anymore; I am using the dryer and putting disposables on my youngest child because I am too backed up on laundry to deal with lines or create one item of extra linen; I haven't even started my homework even though it's about the most fascinating subject ever: monkey penises (no kidding). That's just the beginning, folks. I'm not even going to get into the relative emails and phone calls I have to return.

I hope you all feel encouraged now. If you want to encourage my readers and me, feel free to leave a comment telling me about your own personal failures.

A Tale of Two Goldfish

2009-05-26T21:59:00.000-07:00

Here's just a little sample of how weird my life has become lately: my kitchen is infested with goldfish.

For a school project (mine, not the munchkins) I am keeping goldfish at a variety of temperatures and measuring the effect on their metabolism. How easy is it to keep four different fishbowls at four different constant temperatures in the same room? Not easy, my friends. The things we do for science. So preparing dinner involves working around a jerry-rigged crockpot/heater and a weird cooling contraption that involves an ice chest I have to refill twice a day. Among other things.

The effect of different temperatures on a goldfish's metabolism is important in a world with a changing climate. Goldfish are fairly typical freshwater fish, the lab rats of the pescine world (is pescine a word? doesn't it make me sound smart either way?) so my results can be used to make broader predictions. I may even get it published in a real scientific journal, or at least a homeschooling magazine. Not bad for a housewife!

This is one of two weeks before finals. After finals, I plan to:

nurture my garden beyond it's current neglected state
finish sewing two skirts for my oldest daughter.
reconnect with neglected family and friends.
revamp my website (http://www.sagemommy.com/) and, yes, this includes doing something with the nine months old daily freebies page. It's nice to know you all are still looking.
work on getting some real publishing credits and not just the usual copy. If you would like a parenting or green living article written by the ever-opinionated, ever-interesting Emily Marshall, email me at shastamarshalls@sbcglobal.net . And I'll get that email because I am going to:
clean out my inbox, which has like 10,000+ messages. I wish that was an exaggeration.

See you all in two weeks!

Soccer Saturday

2009-04-25T19:51:00.000-07:00

Today's Tallies:
Time spent on a (gusting, icy) windy soccer field for two different children's games: 2 1/2 hours
My weight despite really watching it yesterday: 141 lbs. 15 pounds heavier than last year at this time. :-(
Test scores on the four tests I took this week: 100%, 100%+ (thanks to an extra credit point), 85%, 82%. Ouch on the last two.
Time I spent on the couch snuggling with my three youngest when I should have been studying, writing for income, or cleaning: 3 1/2 hours (that were worth every minute)

Weekend Projects: Get the garden started, declutter my kitchen, write a 700-page paper on ethanol, do 14 chemistry problems, study for Spanish test, design a killer research project for Biology. Plus laundry and all the mom stuff. See why I shouldn't have been on the couch?

It's What's for Dinner: Whole wheat pasta with homemade pesto sauce, steamed broccoli, canteloupe. Under five bucks and soooo good. Just make sure you have a lunch or breakfast with a decent amount of protein.

Interesting thought of the day: I should not get my children a treat that is contingent on good behavior if I have no intentions of taking away the treat. For instance, fifty-something-dollar-a-pop tickets to Walking with the Dinosaurs. Was I really going to toss one of the tickets if they didn't eat dinner? Really? Luckily, they ate their pesto despite its appalling color (green) and I wasn't forced to find out.

Comments on Comments: I recently rejected a comment to my post on Jon and Kate Plus Eight. Now, on another board I read that Jon and Kate Gosselin actually google themselves and then leave anonymous nasty comments on blogs where people criticize them. I'm not saying they do this, but the post had a few Kate-isms and was particularly vitriolic. Plus, he/she totally contradicted themself. In one line, Anonymous told me I was jealous and in the next he/she said Kate has it really hard. Um, if she has it that hard, why would I be jealous? And I'm not jealous of her exploited, overexposed children who have no privacy or normalcy, nor am I jealous of her interesting-in-a-car-wreck-kinda-way marriage. What am I jealous of, her appalling overuse of disposable plates and cups or her porcupine-ish hair? And I think raising six children the same age would actually be easier once they hit two or so, because you are flying in all different directions with a large family with normal spacing. And she shouldn't have a weekly television show if she wants a quiet life and no commentary on her family.

I rejected the comment because it brought nothing to the discussion. Just namecalling. Try again, Anonymous; I'll publish even rude comments if they have some value.

The one I'm jealous of is Michelle Duggar, not so much her beautiful family as much as her sweet nature and unfailingly positive attitude. In difficult situations, I have actually found myself thinking, how would Michelle respond to this? I think the Duggars are awesome parents despite any other differences between our lifestyles.

What Does It Profit You?

2009-04-02T10:38:00.001-07:00

This is something I have been thinking about a lot lately, as career plans come closer to realities every day. What are my goals in life? Not just in my future work, but in my life in general. Here are a few of my goals:

1. To be close to my Creator, close enough that I can accept His guidance and wisdom. Each person has a unique plan and a unique purpose. I want to know that purpose and fulfill it. I don't spend a lot of space on this blog talking about religion, because I believe that my spiritual journey is too personal to be shared with the masses. However, this is truly the core of my life, and I hope it comes through in my actions and my writing.

2. To have a strong family. My husband and children come after God and before everything else.

3. To be a good steward of my time and resources. This includes people given to my care, like my children, and also the planet. Green living is closely tied to religion for me, because I believe loving God should include acting lovingly toward His creation.

I think intelligence and academic ability are also resources to be used wisely. I have spent much of the past seven months working toward career and academic goals that I think will use my gifts to benefit many other people. Since beginning this path, I have had an unshakeable feeling that I am where I am meant to be, and this makes it easier to get through the discouragement and challenges.

On the other hand, school has to stay in its place. It is important, but not as important as living simply. Certainly not as important as my relationship with God, or being a helper to my husband, or keeping my house in order, or caring for my children. School is demanding, but it isn't everything to me. As the verse says, "What does it profit you if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?"

I know too many mothers who neglect their homes and their families to chase dreams. I don't want to be that person. I have to consciously set up my day to begin with prayer, then family time, then chores, and then, finally, school and work. I don't believe that every woman is meant to be a housewife, but I think that even working moms, especially working moms, need to constantly think about priorities and what comes first.

Green Easter Baskets

2009-04-02T08:44:00.000-07:00

A green Easter basket? How can it be? Don't worry folks, my ideas are green, cheap, and easy.

1. Skip the chintzy plastic basket. Instead, buy sturdy ones that you can stash until next year and reuse. I haven't bought an Easter basket for the better part of a decade. Alternately, you can make or have your kids make woven construction paper ones and lay them in a special place the night before like Christmas stockings. Instructions for the ones below can be found at http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/kidscrafts/basket.htm

2. Skip the weird plastic grass. I've heard of people growing actual grass in their baskets, but that sounds both time consuming and messy, not to mention the relatively high failure rate of houseplants around here. I recommend shredding normal paper, which seems to be what they did in the picture at left as well. We have an endless supply of scratch paper from my husband's work, so we are going to color it with pastel markers and then shred. If you use recycled paper and then recycle or compost the paper grass when you are done, the environmental effect is negligible.

3. Fill with care. Most of us can't afford to fill several baskets with organic free trade candy, and that's okay. I've collected plastic eggs from a few garage sales and sterilized them in the dishwasher. I am going to fill these with jelly beans. We'll have a few pieces of candy, some homemade, iced sugar cookies, and homemade play dough (recipe below) in pretty Easter colors. I always give each kid a coloring book and crayons, and I'll throw in hair pretties and other stuff the kids need anyway.

4. If you already have the plastic stuff, keep it and reuse it. Throwing things away is never the right choice, even if the stuff is embarassingly un-green.

5. Skip the boxes of Easter egg dye. The packaging is crazy, and it's a lot of money for food coloring. You can make your own dye simply by dropping food coloring in vinegar and using it the same way you would boxed dyes. Or, you can go really traditional and use one of the organic dyes below.

Homemade Play Dough
4 cups flour
1 cup salt
4 cups water
4 tablespoons oil
1/2 cup cream of tartar
Mix all ingredients in a sauce pan. Cook and stir over low/medium heat until play dough is completely formed and no longer sticky. Allow to cool slightly before storing in an air tight container or zip lock bag.

Organic Easter Egg Dyes
Boil your eggs in water with a bit of vinegar and one of these ingredients below, then let simmer until color is right--this will take at least 15 minutes.
Purple grape juice (for lavender)
Red cabbage (for blue)
Spinach (for green)
Carrot tops, orange peels or lemon peels (for yellow)
Coffee or black walnut shells (for brown)
Yellow onion skins (for orange)
Beets or cranberries (for pink)
Red onion skins (for red)

Sage Mommy Summer Weight Loss Challenge

2009-04-01T19:52:00.000-07:00

I am just a little more roly-poly than I was last summer, 15 pounds to be exact. I know what caused it: going to school, sitting on my backside, and eating fast and easy lunches. As summer looms nearer and my pants loom tighter, I need to do something. And that something can't involve real dieting, because I need my brain in good working order and I can't see dieting while surrounded by junk food at school. So here's my healthy, non-diet weight loss plan:

1. No white flour or sugar.
2. Drink green tea with every meal.
3. Drink a glass of water every waking hour.
4. Eat a serving of vegetable protein and a serving of high fiber food at every meal.
5. Fifteen minutes of strenuous, raise-the-heart-rate exercise every day.

Obviously I can't change what I've eaten today (I had blueberry pancakes for breakfast and kettle chips for lunch while running from biology to chemistry), but I'll be posting a picture and my daily weigh in tomorrow. Please leave a message if you want to join me. I'm going to make a widget with all participant's blog addresses and my current weight.

Let's see how much we can lose without dieting!

Killing Us Softly, Part 2: It's What's for Dinner

2009-04-01T18:55:00.000-07:00

If you sent an alien with no Earthling experience whatsoever to the United States, they would probably be appalled. Although we seem on the surface to be the most health conscious culture ever to roam the Earth, we are literally killing ourselves. This series looks at how our well meaning actions and well thought out decisions are taking years off our life spans... and those of our children as well.

I am a big advocate of the cheap-is-healthy diet. When people tell me they can't afford to eat healthily, I am that obnoxious person who asks bluntly what they spend, and then tell them that my family spends half as much per person for a very healthy diet. (The exact fraction varies from family to family.) Inevitably, the conversation turns to what we can possibly eat with such a low budget. When I start giving examples, the person interrupts me and asks if we eat meat. Two or three times a week, I tell them. Then they want to know: can I give them a healthy, reasonably priced menu that includes meat at every dinner? And a few things that are a little more convenient maybe?

Of course I can't. It's impossible, at least in my area. If you want to eat healthy, the most obvious and effective step is to cut back on meat and convenience foods. If you want to eat more economically, the most obvious and effective step is to cut back on meat and convenience foods. If you want to reduce your impact on the planet, the most obvious and effective step is to cut back on meat and convenience foods. To me, this sounds like a win-win-win situation. To most people, this sounds like a recipe for lifelong misery.

I've thought a lot about how we, more than any other culture, have gotten hooked on meat. Here are a few of the reasons I can come up with. Feel free to email me if you have another reason.

1. Americans view excessive meat-eating as traditional. In fact, meat was not a part of every single day's cuisine in most families until post World War 2, except in the wealthiest households. I collect old cookbooks, and one from the forties actually suggests that housewives increase their family's meat intake to three times a week. Egad! In Little House on the Prairie and other books, the described diet that is based on fresh produce when possible and meatier meals when nothing else was available. In addition, experts suggest that their meat portions were far smaller than ours. They ate a very low meat diet compared to what modern Americans eat, except during times of the year when fresh vegetables simply weren't available. This has been the way of the world for millennia. It's the diet humans are biologically made to live with. Eating meat every day makes you non-traditional.

2. Americans are afraid of carbs. Getting rid of them does cause you to lose weight, no doubt about that. It's due to taking in fewer overall calories combined with your kidneys shutting down from too much protein. There are healthier ways to lose weight, ones that won't take a decade off your life expectancy. Carbs are your friends if they make up the right proportion of your diet. Whole grains, legumes, and potatoes are all healthy dietary choices that absolutely will not make you fat, PERIOD, end of story.

3. Americans view meat as a sign of affluence. We all want to look a little more successful, right? And eating steak every night is the dietary equivalent of a Hummer in the driveway. Unfortunately, they have roughly the same impact on our planet.

4. Americans think religion somehow suggests that a meat-heavy diet is superior. God made cows, so how can they be bad for the environment? But did God make massive herds of cows, then selectively breed them and pump them full of growth hormones until they are more than twice their natural size? Of course not. It takes a human to be that foolish. Archaeological evidence suggests that the average Biblical family ate meat on special occasions, and rarely at any other times. Wars were fought over lentil fields because they were the top source of protein, a matter of life and death to Israelis and their neighboring tribes.

We can dispute archaeological evidence, but what we can't dispute is that there is no passage in the Bible that suggests eating meat in a moderate way is sinful. In fact, God did not make our bodies with the capability to handle so much meat, and he didn't make our planet with the ability to handle so much livestock. This suggests to me that God doesn't want us to eat meat as often as we currently do.

5. Americans don't understand what meat is doing to the environment. First, animals require much more land per calorie than plants. With space running short and people in other countries suffering for lack of protein, it's only decent to eat in the most efficient way possible. Second, the animals themselves are destructive, producing waste that pollutes waterways and gas that pollutes the air. Third, meat requires more processing than plant foods and more refrigeration. It usually must travel long distances, from where the animal is born to where it is raised, then to a feedlot, then to a butcher, then to a processing plant, before the stores even buy it. This is why it is pound for pound more expensive than vegetable protein, even though the government throws more money at meat than any other food.

I'm not an advocate of zero population growth; I think we can all live here happily if we make certain concessions and lifestyle changes. However, with more and more countries adopting the wasteful American diet, we really are coming to a point where we have to choose between having enough resources to go around or eating meat/driving SUV's/buying plastic/etc.

6. Americans aren't used to the 'feel' of vegetarian meals. If you are used to the heavy, overstuffed feeling of two to three dietary servings of meat (that would be six ounces, by the way) at a time, then it might take a while to learn what a full-but-not-overfilled stomach feels like. Maybe they are a little intimidated by the new flavors and ingredients, or not sure how to get enough protein. If this is an issue for you, the internet and the library can both supply endless stacks of information and recipes. It's natural to resist change, but being an adult means seeing where changes should be made, and then making them.

I don't have to tell anyone how bad packaged foods are. You already know. So all I can say is this: try to give up meat one day a week. Then take it to every other day. Most people live very comfortably eating meat every second or third day while relying on other protein sources in between. It will do wonders for your budget, your waistline, and the planet as well.

Killing Us Softly, Part 1: Germaphobia

2009-03-31T18:09:00.000-07:00

Cheap and Organic Food

2009-03-23T08:00:00.000-07:00

I know I've written something like this before, but just to re-iterate:

A few ways to wedge organic food into a tight grocery budget...

1. Know your priorities. There are lists all over the internet with the top pesticide-containing produce. Find them and buy organic where your money will have the most health benefits

2. Give up junk food. Seriously, as long as you have money for soda and energy drinks and Cheetos, you have money to replace a few key items with organic counterparts. Junk food may fill your stomach and appease your pallate, but in nutritional terms you may as well be swallowing styrofoam. It is a powerful addiction, so be prepared for a difficult weaning process.

3. Look in unconventional places. Our local bread outlet has Bob's Red Mill organic mixes (like for soup, pancakes, muffins, etc) for ultracheap prices. A local health food store has bulk bins where there are plenty of organic whole foods on sale for less than $2 per pound. The Grocery Outlet can be a wonderland of organic goodies like spaghetti sauce and frozen fruit.

4. Look for free sources. This can be as simple as a friend who needs an outlet for her excess zucchini, or a few fresh herbs growing in pots on your kitchen sill. Tomato plants will grow just about anywhere in the summer, and some varieties produce so much you'll be giving them away... or making homemade sundried tomatoes for those long winter months.

5. Check out mail order companies like Azure Standard and the old favorite Amazon.com. Both have certain conditions under which you can get free shipping, making them a truly awesome deal.

We know that Wild Oats and Whole Foods are super pricey, so don't let that scare you away from a healthy choice. Stay out if they don't fit your budget and find places with better choices for your family.

Jon and Kate Minus Me

2009-03-22T12:15:00.000-07:00

When I first got cable, Jon and Kate Plus Eight was one of my favorite shows. I also have a large family, four children and four stepchildren. I appreciated Kate's coupon clipping, yard saling, and constant quest for affordable organic food. This family is supposed to be different--that's why they have their own show--but I liked them because they seemed a lot like my family and the other large families I am close to.

However, after I watched the show for a while, cracks began to appear in Kate's faux finish, and I realized that certain things just didn't make sense. They aren't at all like a normal large family. Here are just a few of the differences:

1. The children are violent with each other, and neither parent seems to care. When you are caught up in how cute they are--and they are indeed beautiful children--you don't notice. After a while, you notice that the older kids are always slapping around the younger ones, and that the younger kids are always hitting each other. Once I saw Kate hit Jon, I realized that the kids are getting this from their parents. There is no respect for each other in this family--none at all. I've been looking. I feel sad for them.

2. For all the talk about organics, you never actually see anyone eating them, or anything healthy for that manner. Instead it's a constant line up of packaged snacks and sugary juices. The parents are always calling these things treats, but it's all you see the kids eating.

3. Individual identities are discouraged. There are a lot of multiples in my family, and while they look cute in matched outfits on holidays, it is devastating to a child's personal identity to be forced into wearing the same outfit as their four sisters every single day. Everything these kids own is identical to their siblings, and chosen by their mother or a sponsor. Forced may seem like a harsh word, but do you think small children honestly don't want to pick out their own toys, books, and extracurricular activities.

4. They aren't allowed to be kids. Mom specifically forbids messy activities. Crayons--rarely. Television--always on. Markers--absolutely not, not even when they are at a Crayola museum. Wii--whenever they want. Kate is a self admitted germaphobe, dirtaphobe, and you never see her letting the kids mess their hair much less get really dirty. It's a backward way of raising little people, who need to explore and get their hands in things. Dirt is good for children, and excessive cleaning keeps mothers from being present in the kids' lives.

5. They are the opposite of green. Everything they own is new with tags and things are replaced regularly. There is a constant parade of clothing, toys, cars, and even houses. Now they are in a mansion with acres of lawn. It's just a little excessive, especially considering that the parents speak at churches talking about their financial hardships, raking in hundreds of thousands of dollars in donations every year.

6. They are very immature for their age and neither parent seems concerned. Their speech, the use of pacifiers and loveys, their motor coordination, etc, all seem more typical of a two year old than a child about to enter kindergarten. I wonder if this is due to problems at birth, or if parents and producers are encouraging them to stay younger and cuter as long as possible.

7. The children never have privacy. I have seen many reality shows, and this is the first one where you see children going to the bathroom, bathing, and other intensely personal activities. I can imagine how much this will suck when the sextuplets go to school and all of their classmates have video of them pooping on the bathroom floor. I wonder if this level of exposing children in intimate areas of their lives is even technically legal. I would love to have my own reality show, but there would be boundaries.

I worry for these kids, especially with rumors surrounding Dad's behavior. I know how vicious rumors can be, but I also know that I am one of many viewers who stopped watching the show a season or so ago because something just isn't right with this family.

Fresh Garbanzo Beans

2009-03-20T09:19:00.000-07:00

A local ethnic market has fresh garbanzo beans on sale. I am a HUGE legume eater, but I had no idea what to do with these beauties.

A little research revealed the following:

1. They are a very neglected vegetable in the internet recipe world.
2. They can be eaten raw or steamed, in both cases tasting a lot like edamame.
3. In the Middle East, they are steamed, mashed, and mixed with spices to make a tasty, bright green hummus.

Because they are similar to edamame, I plan to steam them, then toss them with sauteed mushrooms and noodles along with a little sesame oil and sriracha sauce. This should make a healthy, high protein vegan meal, perfect for a Lenten Friday supper. I'll let everyone know how it comes out!

Tia Always Makes Me Look Bad

2009-03-18T09:01:00.000-07:00

Here I am going to school to save lives, but my good friend Tia (the one on the right) found a more immediate way, and one that does NOT require knowing every intermediate of the Krebs cycle. She's running in a half marathon and raising money to cure leukemia, lymphoma, and other cancers.

Check out her page and give her cause some money, or at least a few good wishes.

Staying Active in a Sedentary Economy

2009-03-07T17:30:00.001-08:00

Last week my whole family (except me--I've already missed too much school) took a day off and went skiing. A friend asked how we can afford to do this. I had to think for a while, because we don't have a lot of expendable income but we do find the money for skiing, biking, and various sports. In the end, I think it comes down to priorities.

We don't buy movies, CD's, books, and other entertainment products. We haven't gone out to dinner for more months than I can count off the top of my head, and even our at-home meals tend to be simple, third world cuisine. My husband and I share a cell phone and truly have it for emergencies only, with few minutes and a monthly cost of under thirty dollars. I can't remember the last time I bought a cup of coffee.

We are very much a no frills family, which leaves us with income for some bigger endeavors, like skiing. We do everything we can to keep skiing affordable--buying season passes when they are on sale, passing down and refurbishing old equipment, carpooling to the nearest ski area, bringing our own lunches. I think we would give it up if if were truly a hardship, as well as other outdoorsy luxuries we currently indulge in, but it would be one of the last things to go.

The economy sucks, but it isn't slowing most people down when they hit the mall. Americans complain about credit card bills and unfair interest rates, but everyone keeps adding to their balance. All those little things add up to not being able to do the big things that really matter. Now more than ever, it's important to keep those little expenses under control.

Living simply isn't just good for the planet, it's good for your budget. It's good for your kids to consciously give up things that complicate their lives in exchange for things that enrich them. Every cart full of miscellanea at Target costs the same as a ski trip for my family. That's enough to take the fun out of impulse shopping for me.

Cheap and Easy Veggie Burgers

2009-03-07T15:23:00.000-08:00

This recipe makes six to eight decent sized burgers.

1 cup diced veggies--cooked ones seem to work best
1 cup cooked rice
1 cup cooked beans, any kind
1 egg
2 Tbsp bread or cracker crumbs
salt, pepper, and other spices of your choice
oil for cooking--about 2-3 Tbsp total

Mix rice and beans, mashing them as you mix. Mix in vegetables, egg, and spices. Use your hands to shape the mixture into balls. Roll the balls in bread crumbs, then flatten against your palms. Fry in a medium skillet for 2-3 minutes per side, until done. Serve on whole wheat rolls.

Obedience Is Over-Rated. And Under-Rated, Too.

2009-03-07T11:30:00.000-08:00

If you look at many child-raising books, obedience is a huge issue. Getting your children to do what you say, when you say it, and the exact way you tell them to seems to be a much written about subject.

Natural parenting sorts like me tend to bristle at these types of books. Personally, I think blind obedience is over-rated. I don't want my kids to be blind followers. I want them to be free thinkers who do the right thing after evaluating it and coming to their own conclusions. If anyone, be it a totalitarian government or a pedophile, tell them to do someing that is wrong for them, I want them to feel comfortable in bucking authority.

Unfortunately, this can lead to complications in the running of a home. I want my kids to question authority, just not my authority. I don't want to spend hours explaining why they should go to bed or clean their room. I have a bunch of smart kids, and they would jump on that bandwagon as soon as it appeared on the horizon. Further, when I tell them to get out of the road or stay away from that dog, safety demands immediate compliance. I know a lot of kids who are just rotten little brats because they can never just do what they are told, and this isn't setting them up for career or academic success.

My plan, which so far seems to work, is this:

1. People in my home, including the children, should be respectful, responsible, and fun to be with.

2. I am willing to discuss the fairness of everyday tasks such as chores, bedtimes, etc, on occasion, but in a respectful way and at an agreed-upon time. I will not discuss bedtime at bedtime, or the fairness of one child setting the table while I am getting dinner ready. I will not cater to whining.

3. No one should ever do anything that hurts or makes them uncomfortable. Eating vegetables does not qualify.

4. When in doubt about whether to obey, ask another adult.

I guess the key is to keep lines of communication open and to avoid forms and amounts of discipline that would make the child fearful. Obedience is definitely expected in my home and in life in general, but one shouldn't shut down their own moral compass.

$5 Dinners

2009-03-07T10:58:00.000-08:00

This week is going to be a busy one. It's the last full week of this quarter, and several illnesses and household emergencies have sunk my grades to a level where I really need to step it up. Because I don't foresee a lot of spare time for cooking in my immediate future, I am making a huge pot of pinto beans today. This will be stashed in the fridge to make five half-hour-or-less dinners this week:

Saturday: vegan refried beans and Mexican brown rice with fresh corn tortillas and a green salad
Sunday: having dinner guests, so I'll actually cook
Monday: Cuban beans (wrong type of beans... oh well) and rice, more corn tortillas, miscellaneous fruit
Tuesday: Boston baked beans, sourdough garlic toast, salad
Wednesday: Chili with vegetables in it (it's that simple... I just add whatever diced vegetables we have and they cook down into the chili mush), brown rice, cole slaw. We like to put brown rice in the bowl and ladle chili over that. It tastes yummy and makes a complete protein.
Thursday: homemade veggie burgers on whole wheat buns, baked sweet potato fries, miscellaneous fruit. The veggie burger recipe will be up on Thursday.

Tuition is due in a week, so we're basically using up everything in the fridge for the next few weeks. Be prepared to see my dinners get more and more creative. However, we never compromise health or environmental friendliness!

On a related subject, I'm loving former Blog of Note $5 Dinners. This is about my price range as well, and I like to see the fun, healthy, and sometimes even organic recipes the author posts. Many, such as the Moussaka, can be easily transformed into even cheaper vegan or vegetarian versions.

I found this blog after deciding to post my own $5 dinner every Thursday. I'll to keep up with it so there aren't too many similar ideas. Several readers have emailed me wondering why a green blog has so many food posts. Food is a huge environmental issue now. If you are like most Americans, it takes more fuel to transport your food to your local grocery store than it does to power your SUV. Changing to easier-to-transport vegetarian options and local, in season fruits and vegetables can have a huge impact on your health, your grocery budget, and your carbon footprint.

The Clothes on Your Back

2009-03-07T10:24:00.000-08:00

My six year old put on her favorite shoes yesterday and found that they were a little tight. She tried another pair--also too small. And so on. Her shoe wardrobe dwindled overnight from an excessive 9 pairs (!!!) to a barely adequate 2. Don't ask me how her feet can grow more than one size in twelve hours. It seems to be the general growth pattern in my home, but it never ceases to amaze me.

Usually when my children outgrow something, I go to the boxes of clothing in our boiler room and find a replacement. We call it 'shopping in the basement'. As I find good deals throughout the year, I stash them in boxes for when we need them. There are a few new things in there, but it's mainly hand-me-downs and thrift store bargains. Anyway, there were no cold weather shoes in Grace's new size. Because it would be a small miracle to find a suitable, like-new pair of size 12 girl's athletic shoes in one of Yakima's three thrift stores this weekend, I may actually be forced to buy something new.

I don't often have to buy new things for my kids, so this is an unusual situation for me. Buying used absolves me of being socially or environmentally responsible for the who, what, when and how of our garments. Now I have to wonder: Should I buy leather shoes, which tend to be more durable and comfortable, when the entire leather industry is more than a little disturbing? How can I make sure Grace's shoes and the materials with which they are made are not produced in some sweatshop manned by third world toddlers?

Then there is the economic aspect of the situation. High quality shoes in my area seem to run in the forty dollar or more range, a small fortune compared to the five dollar limit I normally impose on children's clothing. People look at me like I am a crazy woman when I tell them this, but my most recent under-five bargains include a like new Columbia parka with zip-in fleece liner and new-with-tags Stride Rite shoes for my son that someone apparently bought for sixty dollars but never wore. The average American family spends $624 per year on one child's clothing and even more for adults. We spend somewhere between $50 and $100 per month total for six of us. This includes everything from school clothes to shoes to ski clothing.

If I have to buy Grace's shoes brand new, it will make the third new clothing item I have bought her since her birthday last June. This seems to be the trend in my family. Rachael has received a brand new pair of ski pants and two winter hats this year, while Tyler needed a pair of PE shorts and two pairs of new shoes. Malcolm didn't get anything new; he's still even wearing last year's socks and underwear. Everything else is used, often free. We try to keep things in nice shape and be generous with our hand-me-downs to keep the circle of giving in good working order.

If you give a kid a nugget...

2009-03-05T17:33:00.000-08:00

...she's going to want more nuggets.

Here's a project for you: Find a mom who feeds her kids a steady diet of processed lard and salt, and ask her why. She will probably say that they won't eat anything else. It's an answer, but it isn't the true answer. My kids don't demand hot dogs or mac'n'cheese for dinner every night, and it isn't their great manners that keep them from doing it. It's because they are used to eating healthy, whole foods. Like almost all people, children resist the unknown.

If you want the real answer, you'll have to ask the real question, which why she started feeding them the unhealthy food in the first place. She may cite price, which is interesting because whole foods are so much cheaper per serving and per pound. However, I'm willing to bet that time has a little bit to do with it.

This is why I am going to start posting an easy, fast, and vegetarian dinner every Thursday. As a working mother/college student, time is not exactly in abundance. I find that vegetarian meals can be faster and tastier once you get used to working with the different ingredients. Like the majority of my family's vegetarian meals, I plan to post meals that are nutritionally complete and cost five dollars or less for a family-sized main dish. Here is my first:

Sweet and Spicy Lentils
Cooking Time: 30 minutes
Hands-On Time: Less than 10 minutes

3/4 cup lentils (I like the red ones, but any will do)
1/2 onion, minced
1 clove garlic, minced
tiny bit oil (olive is yummy)
1/2 tsp ground cumin
1/2 tsp cinnamon
1 cup orange juice
3/4 cup water

1. Put the lentils in a bowl of water to soak in the morning.
2. When you begin making dinner, drain the lentils. Prepare the onion and garlic and saute them in the oil. When they are translucent, add all of the other ingredients.
3. Bring to a boil, then turn down the heat and simmer uncovered for about a half hour, until lentils are soft.

**Note**This varies according to how old the lentils are. Older lentils will cook more slowly and require more water, so check every few minutes.

I usually serve this with brown rice (making it a complete protein), toasted bread, and a green salad. If you get things on sale, this entire meal can be made for under $5.

I Love the Whole World

2009-03-03T16:04:00.001-08:00

In case you ever wonder why you work so hard to preserve this crazy home of ours...

The first time I saw this, I was in tears. It really is an amazing place.

The Unbeatable, Eatable Pet

2009-02-23T22:21:00.001-08:00

Who could ever have guessed that livestock flatulence would become a public health issue? Think about this the next time you are enjoying a cheeseburger: cows are one of the least eco-friendly agricultural products. They take immense amounts of space, and are almost singlehandedly causing global warming with their methaneous farts. Even organic, grass fed cattle are culprits.

I like beef and milk as much as the next person, which puts me in a rough position. How can I shovel Mongolian Beef into my mouth without feeling just a little guilty? Miniature cattle just may be a solution to this dilemma.

Miniature cattle are the latest rage among socially conscious farmers. These miniature cows have better "feed conversion" (which means they use less feed per pound of meat) and thus need less space per pound as well. They create less methane gas, which is a major cause of global warming. Plus, they're super cute... which then again may not be a good thing when you consider why they are being bred and raised.

Helping Those Who Can Help Themselves

2009-02-18T20:15:00.000-08:00

It's one of my pet peeves, and I wish I could understand why.

First, I would like to say that I am not a stingy person in general. I like giving. It makes me happy and puts me at peace.

However, I am getting a little ticked off about this economic stimulus bill, and government programs in general. I struggle to pay my tuition and other expenses, while classmates who don't have jobs get their nails done with public funds. A friend who goes to my college makes as much as my husband and I--without anyone in her house actually working. All scholarships, grants, and other public funds. When I'm looking at my third all-night writing session in a row while they lie in their cozy beds resting up for the early morning lecture, it's hard to see them as disadvantaged compared to me, and it infuriates me to know that medical schools will. You see, having a "low income" (scholarships and government funds apparently don't count) will make them a priority candidate, eleigible for more scholarships and public funds, while those of us who are working our way through college will be seen as having an advantage.

One of my teachers said that most people on financial aid are not living an extravagant lifestyle. It's hard to believe this when you walk by the financial aid office on the first day of school and see the long line of professional highlights and Coach purses. Not that I have anything against either. It's just that I have given up those things and just about everything else to pay my tuition... and theirs.

Anyone can do what I do. Copy writing is not an art; it's a J-O-B. If someone wants to be 'advantaged' like me and work all night the night before their trig test, they can absolutely do it. I can refer them to people who will give them all the work they can handle. And then they can pay for their own tuition instead of buying the latest iPhone and see how the other half live.

That sounds meaner than I intend it, so I hope my dear readers will understand what I am trying to say here. I have nothing against people who need help getting it. I just resent paying for toys and allowing people to not work simply because they think they have better things to do.

The C Is Silent.

2009-02-17T20:36:00.000-08:00

This is my Bio professor. His name is Jerred Seveyka. We call him just 'Seveyka' behing his back. To his face, I don't call him anything because he doesn't seem like the 'Mr.' type (and he's my age...), but calling him by his first name seems too familiar. So I just raise my hand or walk up to him and wait for him to acknowledge me, which I hope isn't as creepy as it sounds.

This is his blog. Apparently he plays guitar? Cnido-site is a play on words, btw. Very witty for a man who wears white tube socks with black dress shoes and faded jeans. Seriously, though, he's cool, although he'd be cooler if he graded on a modified curve.

http://seveyka.blogspot.com/

I've only read a few posts, but Seveyka has a gift for making boring subjects tolerable. This is a great place for homeschoolers and people who just love coral to find out more about the beautiful briny sea and all the things people are doing to keep these habitats in good shape.

Medicine from a Blogger's POV

2009-02-17T20:03:00.000-08:00

Things to do when I have a lot of homework and paid writing work:
1. Blog
2. Watch really trashy reality television and feel superior.

A lot of people have asked me how or why I switched gears so quickly. It feels like a former life now, almost a decade as a stay-at-home/work-at-home mommy, who homeschooled and was a substantial part of the local homeschooling scene. I blogged, tried new recipes, and cared deeply about the cleanliness of my bathroom counters.

Blogging has always been a somewhat philanthropic pursuit for me. There are certain things I know about, from experience and a lot of self-education. Green living in a very frugal, unconventional, and attainable way is one of these things. So is running a household. I am a thoughtful type of person, so I tend to research things. A niche blog on green family life fit like my favorite jeans. I began this blog hoping to share what I know in an interesting way that could be read by others, and to learn from these 'others' as well. If I could make money or build some writing cred doing it, all the better. Until I started school and had to temporarily give up blogging, I was well on my way to attaining this.

Medicine has always been one of my interests. I am fascinated by the way the human body works, but I am even more intrigued by the interaction between body and mind. Sometimes, people are overlooked or marginalized by health care systems--I know this because I often find myself and loved ones in this position. This is when one good doctor can make a huge difference.

Multiply that doctor by all of the patients they see in their career, and you have an immense potential for changing the landscape of the health care industry, especially the local flavor of a small community like Yakima. People assume I am interested in the money, but, honestly, family doctors in small towns don't make the rock star wages people think they do, and I'll be entering my early forties with six figures in student loans. I could make more selling cars, and not have to get tear stains all over a biology lab manual in the process.

We all have moments when things just click for us. For me, it happened while watching a documentary about an African midwife who left her family to train to perform cesarean sections. She practiced in a small village with no access to a hospital and lost women every month who might have been saved by a surgical procedure that is routine in the first world. When the government began allowing midwives to perform cesareans, she jumped.

Of course it isn't that simple. She had barriers, just as I do. Some views are worth the hike.

For a long time, I have felt this horrible emptiness, a feeling that I should be doing more to help other people. Like the servant in the Bible who buries his master's money, I have been been merely going on my way and ignoring the potential of my gifts. When I saw the documentary, everything suddenly seemed clear. It's a hard road, a painful road filled with worry and exhaustion and overwhelming waves of inadequacy. I don't know if I can get my grades up that tiny bit to where they need to be without making sacrifices I am not willing to make. I miss the simple joys of the life that once was mine, like spending a morning trying new and fancy braids or watching my son's face as he reads Tolkien for the first time.

I have to believe it will all be worth it in the end. Like blogging, this will be my little way of making a difference and maybe a comfortable living. I view medicine as a two-way sharing of information between the physician and the patient, and I can't wait to learn more so I have something to bring to the table when I finally put on that white coat.

Christmas Re-hash

2009-02-16T22:06:00.001-08:00

Thank you all so much for your warm and supportive comments following the events in my last post. People who called me, I'm sorry I didn't call you back, and I swear I still love you lots.

This Christmas, we had a simpler celebration. Not just because I was in the hospital and relatives were dropping like flies; no, we have been scaling back every Christmas and I now feel like we have reached a sane level.

Decorations included a tree and homemade craft projects. Food was cookies that friends brought over, a pasta Christmas eve dinner, and a larger traditional Christmas Day meal. For gifts, we gave each child two gifts (one each from us and from Santa Claus) plus a stocking with candy and small useful gifts (like socks or hair pretties).

We have had time together this year, much more so than in years past. Which, considering everything going on, has both its benefits and drawbacks. Either way, I had time to rest and get through my hormonal fog.

It's a good thing, too, because the Winter Quarter came a little too soon for my taste. More on my studies later.

I am hoping to post more often now that I am in a good school routine and there are no medical dramas in the foreseeable future (knocks on wood).

The Truth, The Whole Truth... In Abridged Form, Of Course. Still Long, Of Course.

2008-12-21T19:25:00.000-08:00

At my last doctor's appointment, he asked me if I have the support I need. I paused, and he added, "Honestly." I had to answer no.

(That second sentence looks like a punctuation nightmare. I know it already, so forgive me and keep your mouth shut unless you know how it actually should be.)

He was asking me about support because... I've had some stuff going on. And I had to say no, because only a handful of people even know what is going on in my life. How can people support me when they don't know I need support? Why do I keep hiding something that is in no way my fault? This isn't a dirty secret. It's just... my third miscarriage in six months.

The first two pregnancies occurred this summer. They both terminated very early--the first at seven weeks and the second at five. I take pregnancy tests the second my period is late, so I knew about both for a while. Long enough to start thinking about names. Long enough to go through the baby stuff in my basement and decide I would need a new crib, and maybe new crib bedding to go with the new crib. Still, I was over it after a week or two. Once the bleeding stopped, the grieving stopped. The first miscarriage I blamed on a genetic anomaly. It happens. It isn't a baby, I told myself. It's an Unbaby.

The second one worried me a bit. I did some research and found out the birth control method I was using to space out my children to a more reasonable two years apart may or may not cause miscarriages if a pregnancy does occur. I discontinued using it. After all, it wasn't exactly, umm, working, and I'd rather have a viable, albeit unplanned pregnancy than a miscarriage.

I found out I was pregnant again at the beginning of November. I was so happy. No, I was ecstatic. I was over the freakin' moon. I felt pregnant--unlike my last two unpregnancies. You have never seen a woman so happy to puke every morning. I made a doctor's appointment. I ceased drinking coffee (for the most part), exercising, eating anything artificial, anything that I might have done wrong the other two times. I worried at every twinge, but I told myself: no blood, no panic. I went to the first prenatal appointment bracing to be lectured about the nine pounds I had gained.

He didn't find a heartbeat. The doctor was nonchalant about it; I was in instant panic attack mode. When he was listening to--whatever they listen to on your back, your heart or lungs or both--he told me to breath normally. This is as normal as it gets.

Because no doctor likes hyperventilating maybe-pregnant-maybe-not women in their office, he offered to do a quick ultrasound. He found a water sac, a pregnant-ish uterus, but no baby. It's called a missed abortion. I lost the baby, and I never even knew it. 'No blood, no panic'? Apparently not a medically sound policy. I was almost ten weeks pregnant, but not really.

That is the biggest shock I have ever experienced. I felt bad for Dr. Davenport, because I knew he was counting seconds until this entire not-really-prenatal visit was over. Sheesh, he's like my baby brother's age. Just had his own first child. Such a nice guy, but he has to be thinking please, please, please, don't freak out. I started to cry, but stopped myself long enough to get out.

It was 5:30 PM and I had this to-do list. Pick up kids from preschool. Get daughter ready for her Christmas play. Go to Christmas play. Tell husband our baby is dead. Move the Pottery Barn crib set that the UPS man delivered while I was at my doctor's appointment. Complete two writing jobs. Study for second day of finals.

Did you know life keeps happening when your baby dies? It's really surprising when you are in the moment. Like, how come the Christmas play isn't cancelled? How come Christmas isn't cancelled? Intellectually, you understand, but emotionally, it just seems like the world should stop turning for a few days, maybe even a month or so. And no one knows why you are crying at your daughter's play or why you are rude to her teacher. No one knows why your writing assignment is late, or why you fail your finals despite being a straight-A student up to that day.

I'd like to make a note here. I had never considered that I would be hit this hard by a miscarriage, but it is the biggest and most terrible shock I have ever experienced. I have buried a parent at a young age, been unceremoniously dumped by my oldest son's father after working three jobs to support our fledgling family while he finished his degree... none of it even compares. When my son almost died twice earlier this year, I was so distraught that about three-quarters of my hair fell out. I can't wait to see what this does. (Please, God, spare my hair. There's so little of it left. It was just starting to come back in. Don't leave me ugly and barren.)

The day after my finals, I had another ultrasound at a facility with more sophisticated equipment. My doctor wanted to do more tests to make sure the baby was really gone. He also wanted more data on the huge growth in my pelvis that he found while looking for my runaway fetus. Did I forget to mention that? The possibility of having cancer was nothing compared to the reality of not having a baby. Mere background noise.

At the appointment, the ultrasound lady went and fetched her supervisor. They agreed to call my doctor. Then, they came back and did the rest of the ultrasound. I won't tell you what a transvaginal ultrasound is--that should be self explanatory. I will merely suggest that the 'wand' used for it is so long, I laughed when I saw it. Seriously, if it vibrated they could market the thing to lonely women.

They told me that my doctor would get the results by Monday and then call me. I was a little concerned about the whole 'call the doctor' thing. But then, I thought, if I really had a problem, they would fast-track the ultrasound to the radiologist, not let it languish in his inbox for almost a week.

What did I do in the meantime? I cried every day. I cried every hour. I went to my husband's company Christmas party and got ploughed on a Riesling with a silky honey aftertaste. Everyone commented--more than a year already and I'm not pregnant? I watched Tori Amos videos on Youtube. Did you know she had three miscarriages before she finally had a successful pregnancy? Now I know why almost every song on From the Choirgirl Hotel is about her miscarriages. If I could write a song that adequately expressed how shredded I am about this, it would be all I did. Song after song. Instead, all I have are my words.

I stayed home all day Monday and--no call. Then, on Tuesday, my doctor called. The growth was a corpus luteal cyst, which is something pregnant women get sometimes. It was already almost gone when they did the second ultrasound. Because, of course, I wasn't pregnant. That's why the techs were calling him so frantically. They couldn't find anything noteworthy and wanted to make sure they were looking in the right place.

My uterus was seven weeks pregnant, which I guess means that is how far I made it before the baby died. I tried to think what I did that week. What was so important that I didn't realize my child was dying? I can't go there... but I can't not go there either.

I was spotting, not so much spotting but passing a few tiny blood clots. My doctor expected that my next 'period' would be heavier than usual. Because, you know, I had all the baggage from a seven week pregnancy. Other than that, I was physically a-okay. Right, I thought, except that I have all this rotting tissue inside me. I told him that I was (am) going crazy. He thought that sounded like a normal reaction and offered antidepressants, which I refused.

Late that night, I woke up because something was... ummm... coming out. Like, several blood clots the size of golf balls, along with a lot of blood and cramping that felt like labor pains. I thought, wow--it all happened at once. Baby suite, dismantled. All over. Except that it kept happening, every twenty minutes or so. It was so freaky, I was afraid to call the doctor's on call guy. Afraid to go to the ER. Who is going to believe this? I couldn't fit all of those clots in my entire abdomen, so every time seemed like it had to be the last.

By morning, I had bled through two large packages of maxi pads and every pair of pajamas I own. I decided to take a shower (not exactly springtime fresh after my night of horrors), take the kids to school/preschool, and then call the doctor. My own doctor would believe me. I think he'd believe anything I said at this point; I'm a walking anomaly, but an honest one. Although, I briefly considered, I did just tell him not twenty-four hours ago that I'm going crazy.

I didn't get the chance. I passed out just after getting out of the shower. I awoke not long after, but I couldn't talk, and every time I lifted my head the room started to turn gray. After a few minutes, my daughter walked in. Why don't kids knock? But thank the heavens she didn't. Get Daddy, I whispered. She came back and said Daddy was leaving. I couldn't think of anything to say. My wise little girl, she went back and insisted that he come. By the time he walked in, I could sit up, hunched over. There was blood everywhere. He looked around in shock, and I said, I'm bleeding to death. It seemed a reasonable conclusion. He said he was calling an ambulance, and I told him just to put the kids in the car and bring me some clothes so we could drive to the hospital.

I looked bad when we got there, bad enough that they took me back while asking me what had happened instead of making me go through the triage thang. They started an IV and did a screwy job that left a huge bruised lump on my hand that is still there. I started to feel better, and a little sheepish. You see, the blood clots stopped coming as soon as I arrived at the hospital. Of course. But my blood pressure was low--90/60 after two bags of fluid. And I was bleeding like crazy, blood just pouring out of me. They knew something was going on.

They did a ton of tests, including an awkward pelvic exam throughout which I apologized to the doctor for how gross this had to be. I hope this is the low point of your day. I'd hate to think it goes downhill from here. The tests--including another transvaginal ultrasound, which wasn't so much funny as painful this time--showed I was full of baby detritus that was poised to exit, possibly taking a lot of blood and fluid with it. Seeing as how I didn't have a lot of either left to spare, the ER doctor wanted to do a D & C, which is this horrendous, invasive procedure in which they scrape your uterus clean while you are completely awake and without anesthetic. My doctor popped in, and thought that was unnecessary. I'll go with his opinion, thank you. They decided to admit me and give me medicine to make all this baby stuff come out while I was under their expert supervision.

It didn't go according to plan. As soon as I took the pills, the bleeding let up, which is the opposite of what it was supposed to do. My blood pressure kept getting lower. My blood count kept getting lower. The machine showed my blood pressure at 83/40, so the nurse took it by hand. That reading was lower, 80/37. The other nurse--who told me several times how crowded they were and how they needed my bed--came in and took it, saying it was 90-something over 50-something. She was so lying. But it was enough that I was sent home. I was happy to go home.

I had a mess on my hands at home when I arrived at 11 PM. I had to change my sheets, scrub the mattress, and get all the bloody laundry to the laundry room. This was a challenge when I couldn't walk five steps without getting dizzy. Finally, I went to bed. I'm still bleeding heavily four days later with some frankly disgusting stuff coming out of me. I had a follow up appointment and my doctor was so quiet and gentle instead of the all-business type thing you usually get with doctors. When he found out I did poorly on my finals, he wrote a letter to my teachers requesting that I be allowed to retake them. He even printed it out right away because I have to go visit my dying grandfather two states away and didn't know when I could pick it up. It's such a compelling letter (yeah, I read it, before I even started the car in fact) that I wondered if he worked his way through medical school as a freelance writer, the way I am doing it right now. But who cares? I doubt my dillweed professors will let me retake the tests because they are jerks that way and all men besides.

The doctor has been such a rock star through all this. I forgive him for his rude office staff, for the giganto pain in the tokhes it is to make an appointment, for picking on me about my weight gain when I was pregnant with Rachael and not exactly bathing in love for my swollen thighs. I hope his wife is super nice and makes him homemade baklava and rubs his stinky, hairy feet at night. He's that awesome. He's cute, too, but don't start seeing him. He has enough patients. It's easier to get a papal audience than to get a routine well child visit with this guy.

So, that's what's been going on with me.

A Few Thoughts On High School

2008-12-03T09:51:00.000-08:00

When I started back in college, I honestly thought I could homeschool and go to school myself. After a few weeks, one kid flew the coop and started school. Then it was like a mudslide, and before I knew it, all of my kids were in school. We're like, well, normal people. at least on the outside. But we remain homeschool rebels on the inside, which is why I want to scream when I hear the following:

1. "Homeschooled kids are weird (pronounced weee--yurd). There's more to education than reading books."

This girl, L, is the daughter of teachers and has probably never actually met a homeschooler beyond a quick "hi". She was a straight-A student at the best public high school in the area and is now failing college level math because--oops--they don't teach real math in schools now. Being able to write an articulate essay on the meaning of a quadratic formula is an interesting skill, but it does you no good when it comes time to solve for 'X'. But I digress...

Judging from what my eighth grader tells me about his school, here are a few things that would be 'weee-yurd':

Enjoying learning
Reading
Having any religion
Having dreams for your future that include an Ivy League education
Volunteering
Having political opinions you didn't get from MTV
Knowing that corn syrup is the devil
Caring about babies stuck in the Darfur situation
For girls, looking like your clothes weren't bought at Frederick's of Hollywood
Not having sex with someone after dating for two weeks

I'm proud of my weird kids. They're kicking ass at school academically and have a ton of friends. Some people think they're a little weird--whatever. They're proof that, while traditional schoolers may have a hard time adjusting to anything BUT traditional school, homeschoolers can do well anywhere. They're used to dealing with a variety of people in a variety of contexts, and kids their age in a classroom setting is just one of those contexts. Compare this to many public school kids, who really can't identify with people who aren't their age and grade.

My kids could learn in a cave. Which is good, because the celebrated West Valley School District offers very little more than a cave would. I consider it free babysitting. My kids still do their homeschooling curricula after school and on weekends--they're hungry for knowledge after all day in an environment devoid of it.

Next thing:

2. "All mainstream Christian churches believe in evolution. It's only closed minded extremists and uneducated people who don't."

First, I believe in evolution. Second, I jumped down this professor's throat. Lutherans aren't mainstream? Really? What about Pentecostals? How many millions of people are Pentecostal or Evangelical? He's marginalizing a lot of people. I bet he believes everyone who didn't vote for Obama is a closed minded extremist too.

Making broad negative statements about people just because they have to disagree with you... now THAT'S what I call closed minded. I believe people have the right to have other opinions. That's okay with me. I think evolution is fascinating... but if you don't agree, I still respect you as a person. My Bio professor should extend the same courtesy.

3. "I think all kids should go to public schools. There's more to an education than getting good test scores."

There was a time when public school advocates said that homeschoolers and private schools could not get the education they needed. Now that the facts about homeschoolers and private schoolers have been pretty conclusively proven--that they outperform public school kids, that is--the story has changed. Now, getting an education is beside the point. School is about more than learning. It's about:

learning to deal with people from different backgrounds
being 'socialized'
learning to be socially conscious
learning to, you know, be normal

It's amusing because most public schools are not even close to a homogeneous mix of backgrounds. The West Valley School District is almost entirely white middle and upper middle class kids. My children were learning more about other cultures when they spent the morning with a lady from the Philippines with some other homeschooled friends. They learned about what she loved about her home, why she still had to leave, and that Filipino food rocks. This is just one of hundreds of examples I could give. The point: no freakin way are public schools a good place to learn about different kinds of people.

The only other place you'll be stuck in a small room with other people your age all day is a nursing home.

And 'socialized'? For what? To learn to be bullied? To get in fights? My kids have been taught to be civil and respectful. They're popular with their classmates and their teachers adore them. Apparently not being smacked around (except by me... lol, jk) hasn't left them unable to deal with their peers.

Socially conscious? I won't even go there. It doesn't take a pre-med student to figure out that watching Star Trek every day in honors social studies isn't going to give you this profound understanding of world issues. As for being normal, see #1.

Why do public school advocates come up with these cheesy arguments? Because they are failing. Our public schools are getting worse by the day if you look at the statistics, and the only way they can justify the billions of tax dollars that go to this failed experiment is to say they are offering things that can't be measured.

MacGuyver Monday: Getting back in the saddle

2008-10-26T16:09:00.000-07:00

Usually my Macguyverings have to do with reusing materials and unwanted items, but lately I am short on another commodity as well: time. I had to give up blogging, posting freebies, and ~~cleaning and cooking~~ other important activities I enjoy. However, I am reorganizing my life to allow more time for these things. So here is my newly MacGuyvered daily schedule:

5 AM: Get up, showered, and dressed
5:30 AM: Make bed and turn on computer. Answer email, post freebies, and blog if these have not already been done the night before.
6:00 AM: Start laundry and clean that day's morning cleaning area (see chart below).
6:30 AM: Wake up kids. Eat breakfast with them and get them ready for daycare or school if they are in the group that go to one of these places.
7:00 AM: Wake up kids that don't go anywhere. Review the day's plan. Load lunches and stuff into car.
7:30 AM: Leave the house and take everyone where they need to go.
8:10 AM or so: Arrive at college, park, and go to pre-calculus.
8:30 AM: ~~Rue the day I decided to be a Biology major, because you know they don't make liberal freakin arts majors learn what f(x) means~~ Precalculus
9:30 AM: Catch up time. This is usually when I do my homework or type up whatever lab report is due that day.
10:30 AM: Biology. Not your sissy Biology, but Biology for Science Majors. Please note: on MWF, this class ends at 11:30 and I eat a hurried lunch while running to the computer lab so I can work on paid writing. On TTh, we have a longer period to allow for lab work and it ends at 12:30. On these days I eat lunch with a friend or read.
1:10 PM: Chemistry. Again, not the Chemistry most people take. That Chemistry was two or three pre-req's ago. On MWF, this ends at 2 and I spend an hour in the library studying afterward. On TTh, it ends at 3--lab again.
3:30 PM: Pick up kids from their various places. We're all home by 4 if it goes well.
4:00 PM: Take people to lessons if it is Monday, Tuesday, or Thursday. Try to squeeze in quality time with children who are not in their lessons; otherwise, do homework or go grocery shopping.
5:30 PM: Home from lessons. Start dinner. Turn over laundry. Correct children's schoolwork and oversee homework while it cooks.
6:00 PM: Eat dinner. Sometimes DH isn't home, but eating any later means people (me) get to bed too late.
6:30 PM: Clean up from dinner and clean up that day's cleaning area.
7:00 PM: Pack lunches and bags for the next day.
7:30 PM: Children's bedtime routines.
8:00 PM: Study schoolwork.
9:00 PM: Do an hour of paid work
10:00 PM: If not passed out, write the next day's blog and post freebies.

There are a few downfalls to my system. First, areas of my home may need cleaning more often than they actually get cleaned. Tough cookies. Pre-med is hard enough without adding endlessly repetitive cleaning tasks.

Second, I should be studying 45 hours per week according to most calculators. Ooops. I count two hours a day TOPS. Weekends are spent catching up with loved ones and more paid work--did I mention my childcare bill is in the four figures? I'm scraping by with mid to high B's--and, yes, I know that's not good enough for med school. I'm trying to find more study time, or at least a more effective study method.

Third, I suffer from overproductivity syndrome. In class, my eyes are darting around and I have trouble concentrating on JUST the professor. Why? I'm used to doing three or more things at once. I'm used to keeping track of a horde of little people while performing these multiple tasks. One man talking is simply not enough to command my attention.

I bet they think I'm on crack.

Oh, the cleaning schedule:

Morning: Monday: Living room
Tuesday: Upstairs bathroom
Wednesday: Kitchen
Thursday: Landing and Laundry room Friday: Master bedroom

Evening:
Monday: Dining Room
Tuesday: Downstairs bathroom
Wednesday: Finish kitchen
Thursday: Family room
Friday: Kids' rooms

Weekends: Fold and put away laundry, do the week's shopping and planning. Breathe.

State of the Union Address

2008-10-11T21:37:00.000-07:00

Oh dear, has it really been more week than a week since I posted? It's been so long since we caught up, so I figured I'd give you a head to toe account of how I'm doing lately.

Hair: Falling out, which it has been doing on and off for the last year or so. My hair will just start growing back long enough to get extensions, then fall out before I can make the appointment. I even started eating meat every day--a desperate measure for me--and (sigh) nothing. I feel like people are always staring at me and hoping whatever exotic disease I have isn't contagious. A friends assures me it isn't that bad.

Brain: Over tired. Precalculus, biology, chemistry, repeat as necessary. Most of my classmates are either youngsters supported by their parents or have these phenomenally supportive spouses and families. Mine are supportive in theory, but they aren't willing to do anything crazy like... the dishes.

Face: free of makeup. No time. Plenty of stray eyebrow hairs, though, if you're into that kind of thing.

Clothes: clean. I do have some standards. I'm getting more casual by the day, however. I walked into class on the first day of the quarter wearing a silk designer shirt with a lot of fussy folds held together by a belt and shoulder seams, topping True Religion jeans and adorable suede ballet flats. Eek? Everyone else was in the baggy sweats and torn jeans that apparently comprise the uniform of this generation. I'm not going that far, but I have definitely downshifted into jean and tee mode.

Nails: decidely unmanicured. Short. Boring. Like my hair, but not falling out.

Shoes: a whole other issue. A professor who shall remain nameless has a few simple rules for lab day: closed toed, no cloth or other easily permeable material. Sound simple enough? I wore some adorable kitten heeled loafers and the 'no heels' caveat was added. Fair enough, but I actually own not one pair of shoes that meets all three criteria. Out of maybe one hundred pair of shoes. I keep looking for something cute and suitable, but nothing has surfaced. I do have ballet flats, but I think they rather miss the point because they leave my feet unprotected.

I feel like an ambassador to another planet. Academia is hostile to homeschooling, ignorant of the grassroots organic/environmental movement of which I am a proud part, and generally a yin to my yang. These are people who think Al Gore deserved that Nobel Prize and that the average person needs someone in power to tell them how to manage every aspect of their lives. Can I get a side of ration with that intelligence? I am an oddity in the crowd of fresh, impressionable things. A thirty something mother who has experienced the real world and came back to report. I have a young face, so sometimes I feel like a spy. Does my math teacher know that I have eight-count-them-eight children? He likely thinks I am tired from a kegger, which would explain the dirty looks every time I yawn during his early morning lecture.

It's Like Netflix, But For Cool People

2008-10-02T06:55:00.000-07:00

I used to get Netflix, but I was a little frustrated by the experience. They had a lot of mainstream movies, but a rather thin selection of the artsy foreign movies and obscure documentaries that I prefer. I ended up cancelling the service because the only people finding movies they liked were my children, who can get that twenty-four hours a day from Noggin and PBS kids.

Then I found GreenCine. I am in love! They have thousands of movies that I have never seen or heard of--which means less of the 'hollywood machine' formula films that are pushed down our throat at every turn. Plus, they have a huge selection of documentaries to enrich our homeschool lessons, and those strange Japanese anime movies that my almost-13-year-old loves.

I think they have some sort of free trial, but I'm not sure. Regardless, this is worth every penny. I haven't seen my favorite french movie since I broke the VHS tape from overuse when I was seventeen.

MacGuyver Monday: Easy Meals

2008-09-29T06:33:00.000-07:00

Sorry I bailed on you guys for a week or so. I started college classes this week, and it was a fast and painful transition. Academia is very different from my everyday life; very different from everything but academia. And since I hope to plough right through graduate school, this is going to be a huge part of my existence for the next decade or so.

Unlike my classmates, I don't go home to a dorm with a cafeteria. I go home to a house of crazy, momma-love-deprived kids who have lessons to be driven to. And immediately after those lessons, I am supposed to magically produce dinner, somewhere between making a chart of the electron transport system in the mitochondria and figuring out what the tabernac my math teacher was talking about. This last week was not exactly the well-oiled machine I like for my life to be, and issue number one is dinner.

This weekend I planned ahead. I boiled a big pot of beans that became two dinners worth of chili. While they were cooking, I took a family pack of hamburger bought on sale and made another four meals: Swedish meatballs, Italian meatballs, and two packages of taco meat. One of the taco meats we used for taco salad that night, but this leaves a freezer with healthy options for the rest of the week. I also made a batch of whole wheat dinner rolls and froze the dough.

We aren't big meat eaters around here--not because we wouldn't like to be, but because finances and the needs of our planet dictate otherwise. My dinner plan is to eat 3-4 meat meals per week, 2 bean based meals, and 1-2 egg or cheese based meals. Every weekend I plan to prepare those 3-4 meat meals with a family pack of whatever is all natural and on sale, plus cook the beans and spice them accordingly.

Are we going to eat hamburger all week? Of course not. We're going to eat one more of those hamburger meals and then I'll scramble for the rest the way I did last week. But it won't always be this way. I figure that if I make 3-4 chicken breast meals this weekend and do something with, say, pork the weekend after, by the end of the month I'll have a freezer filled with a variety healthy homemade options for dinner.

Tough Places

2008-09-20T06:08:00.000-07:00

Just a little complaining...

I belong to a Budget Homemaking group through Yahoo. I love this group. I think they have the best ideas, and usually ideas that cut expenses are ecologically sound. There are a lot of great women on the group. But then, there's the... others.

You know the type. Unresourceful. Provincial. When the going gets tough, they whine and put it on their high interest credit card. One person was asking for tips on living on the less than one thousand dollars a month that her husband makes. Someone suggested she, um, get a job. I mean, there's a point where you just need more money.

The $%&# seriously hit the fan. The person who said it was called judgmental and uncompassionate. I recently was called this when I suggested that someone move. They said that there are no jobs in Michigan and that the only job her husband could get was working part time at Wal-Mart.

I told her: been there done that. Not at Wal-Mart, but I've lived in some pretty dismal job markets. I educated myself so I was more hireable and eventually moved to another area that was both cheaper and had more jobs. I told her she should move to Yakima. There seem to be lots of jobs here. My husband can't keep good employees at $10 an hour.

So that's when I became the less than compassionate one in her eyes. Because she, of course, doesn't think she should get a job, or that her husband should get a second job. She doesn't want to leave Trailer Park, Michigan, and she's not interested in school either.

She blames the government. After all, a completely uneducated man working part time at an entry level job for decades on end should be able to support a large family in style, buy a nice home and have two car payments. If he can't, it's a government problem.

Fine, you're trapped okay? I pity you and I think the government should just cut you a fat check because you are too unresourceful and unwilling to adapt to survive in any economy, much less our current one. Is that what you want to hear? Vote Democrat. They have a whole political party set up for that philosophy.

I didn't say that. I gracefully bowed out of the discussion. The mods soon closed the topic anyway, but not without a dig at 'judgmental people'. That would be me, for suggesting that earning more money is the answer to not having enough money. (btw, I don't think the Republicans are much better, so please don't be offended)

We've all been in these tough places. You just figure it out. And, believe me, it's easy to figure out how to move to another state than how you're going to pay $750 in rent from a $600 monthly income. Once you're settled or just no longer in financial crisis mode, you should be thinking, how can I make sure this never happens again. For my family, this meant finding ways to beef up dh's resume, even if he is 100% happy with his current job. Learning Spanish, taking irrigation classes, becoming more hireable in the field he loves. And I'm taking college classes so if something happened to him or his job, we could pull a family switcheroo and I could be the breadwinner for a while.

Resourceful people almost always make it, regardless of the economy. Unresourceful people almost never make it, regardless of the economy.

My Picture Here

2008-09-18T09:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday's Wordless Wednesday was supposed to feature pictures taken by my six year old daughter on her digital camera.

Her auntie bought her this camera about a year ago, and I hope dear Auntie doesn't read this, because it was taken out of the package for the first time just a few days ago. It was buried under some construction paper and found when I re-organized our school supplies.

She took pictures and filled up the 25-snapshot memory card. I went to load them on my computer and... couldn't. Not on any of our computers. I looked online for support and found out it is a WalMart camera and that it doesn't work for anyone.

Very disappointing.

I also saw the original cost, and was (a.) surprised that Auntie spent that much on one of my kids--there so many of us that I don't expect extended family gifts, especially not pricey ones--and (b.) mad that WalMart has gotten away, once again, with selling crap that doesn't work for an inflated price and people still think they are the 'low cost leader'.

I have been thinking of getting the kids digital cameras for Christmas because they seem like a useful tool that will outlive the toys and candy. But they won't be from WalMart.

Tis the Season...

2008-09-16T00:30:00.000-07:00

... to collect and save seeds.

If you grew your veggies with organic or heirloom seeds, you have a better chance of this working. Even with conventional vegetables, it can't hurt to give it a try.

First, collect the seeds, rinse them, and let them dry. Take a few out of each group of seeds and put them in a damp paper towel. Keep in a warm, moist environment. If a few of them sprout, you know you have useable seeds. Put them away in a safe place for spring.

Next spring, germinate them like you would any seed. Wasn't that easy?

Hallelujah, Hear the Angels Sing

2008-09-15T08:44:00.000-07:00

Last week I actually got a doctor's appointment for two of my children. And it doesn't conflict with anything else! Two down, two still needing check ups. Better than nothing.

MacGuyver Monday: Baby Wipes

2008-09-15T08:38:00.000-07:00

I recently found myself without baby wipes and in desperate need of them. It wasn't the drama it sounds like because I had a back up plan. Here are a few things you can use in place of them.

A warm wet washcloth.
A warm wet rag.
DIY disposable wet wipes: Using the strongest paper towels you can get, cut one roll in half and remove the cardboard roll. Make a solution of 1 cup boiling water, 1 T baby lotion, 1 T baby soap, and 1 T baby oil. Place ½ roll of paper towels in a reusable container (an empty baby wipes box is ideal.) Pour solution over towels and allow to cool before using.
Another idea (and one that may replace commercial wipes in my house) is to cut up old rags and used clothes, put them in a wet wipe container, and cover with the solution from above. Because you paid nothing for them, you can toss them if they get really grody, or wash and reuse if not.

Ecology Without the Effort

2008-09-12T14:55:00.000-07:00

I just wrote the funniest article--Green Living for Lazy People. I was a ghost writer, so I have no idea where it will end up published, but it's an interesting idea.

Can you be 'green' without putting in a lot of time and effort? When you think of low carbon living, the first activities that come to mind are time consuming. Time consuming as in: hanging out laundry, rinsing and washing cloth diapers, sorting recycling, walking to the store. Green living can be expensive too, especially if you believe the commerical machine pushing ecology as something you can buy via a Prius, solar panels, and shade grown coffee.

I'm not picking on shade grown coffee; I drink it every morning (..., noon, and night...). But we are doing our beautiful Mother Earth a terrible disservice if we allow green living to become another unreachable goal. Most of the time, it's a simple as using less. Does it take more time to not buy those smooth, silky high thread count sheets at Macy's? Of course not. It's cheaper to not buy them as well. And while they may be organic cotton or bamboo from a fair trade alliance, the sheets you have in your closet are still greener and fairer.

Most of green living lies not in the things we do or the things we buy, but in the things we don't do or buy. In this spirit, here are a few things I am not doing or buying this week:

1. Individually wrapped snacks.
2. A new blanket for the baby (saw one I loved :-( ).
3. A new eyeliner I've been coveting.
4. New flannel sheets to replace my slightly thin and decidedly un-fluffy ones.
5. Birthday invitations for my 12 year old's party. We already have paper, thank you.

Here's a green challenge that won't cost you a minute or a dime: every week when you make your shopping list (mental or written down), cross off three to five things you can physically live without.

Wordless Wednesday: We've all had these days

2008-09-10T19:56:00.000-07:00

Cheap Organic Food Wherever You Happen to Be

2008-09-09T09:54:00.000-07:00

I admit that, while I try to eat local, there a few necessities that are not grown in my area. Namely, cereals. I love some of the organic cereals out there, especially the ones made by Kashi and Bear Naked, but I can't seem to find them reasonably priced in my area.

Which is why this sale at Amazon is so exciting...

Amazon is giving $15 off every Kashi purchase of $39 or more when you use the promo code KASHIDIS at checkout. They have the same deal for Bear Naked Products with the code BEARNKED. Don't forget that free shipping.

When you buy food from Amazon, it seems like a lot of money because you are buying by the case. It is a shocking amount of food, but still a usable amount. For instance, I am buying--right now, in another window--a case of Kashi granola bars from Amazon. It's $49 for 12 boxes with six granola bars in each box. That's already a lot cheaper than the full store price. When you take off my $15, it will be $34, or less than $3 a box. That's an awesome deal for a snack I can feel good about. Because the kids aren't in school, we only eat about a box a week, so that's 3 months worth. It will definitely keep on my pantry shelf for that long.

They do sell Kashi and Bear Naked at my local Costco for a similar per-unit price, but they sell only multi-packs, and my family hates raisins.

Amazon has deals like this all the time, and they deliver almost anywhere.

MacGuyver Monday: Quick Breads

2008-09-09T09:39:00.000-07:00

"Wait--it's not Monday," you say.

"Umm, yeah, somewhere in the world it probably is," I reply. "And I don't want to hear any international date line garbage. Just read about my biscuits."

It's the perfect time of year for kitchen sink soup, with cool evenings and garden full of lovely veggies begging to be used up. But man cannot live on soup alone. What can you serve with your MacGuyvered soup when you don't have time to bake? MacGuyvered bread.

The following three recipes are staples in my house. They are easy to make and I almost always have the ingredients for at least one of them.

Basic Biscuits

Ingredients:
2 cups sifted flour
2 tsp. baking powder
4 tablespoons butter or oil
1/2 tsp. salt
about 3/4 cup milk

Mix dry ingredients. Cut in butter or oil. Add milk gradually and stir until a dough is formed. Turn out on slightly floured board and lightly "knead" for 30 seconds, enough to shape. Roll about half an inch thick. I cut them into squares instead of circles because it's so much easier, but you can cut them into any shape you want. Then, bake on ungreased sheet in a 400 degree oven for 12-15 minutes. This makes about a dozen.

I spice mine up with whatever we have in the pantry. Garlic cheddar biscuits are a hit at my house, as are rosemary parmesan. They sound and taste gourmet, but it's just a matter of throwing in a few pinches of extras.

Basic Cornbread

2 cups corn meal
1 cup white flour
4 teaspoons of baking powder
2 teaspoons of salt
1 cup sugar
4 tablespoons melted butter
2 eggs
1 cup milk
Honey to glaze the top if desired

Mix corn meal, flour, baking powder, and salt.
Add sugar and melted butter.
Beat eggs and add to mixture along with milk.
Mix well by hand.
Pour into a greased 9 X 13 pan and bake at 350 degrees for
20-25 minutes until top of bread is light brown in color.
Spread a thin glaze of honey on the top of the cornbread and
return to oven for about 10 more minutes.
Cool slightly before serving.
This is a family sized recipe that makes a medium pan of cornbread. Again, the magic is in the add-ins. I like cheddar and green chili.

Crisp Flatbread

1-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 cup whole wheat flour (or 1/4 cup more all-purpose flour)
1 teaspoon baking powder
2 teaspoons kosher or sea salt
1 tablespoon fresh herbs, chopped (optional)
1/3 cup olive oil
1/2 cup water
1 tablespoon olive oil, for brushing (optional)
More chopped fresh herbs (optional)
More fresh ground salt
Toasted sesame seeds (optional)

Place a heavy baking sheet into the oven. Preheat to 450F.
In a bowl, stir together the flours, baking powder, salt and herbs. Make a well in the center and stir in the oil and water with a wooden spoon until a dough forms. Lightly flour a work surface and knead gently four or five times.

Break the dough into three parts, then divide each into four pieces to make twelve. On a sheet of parchment paper the size of the baking sheet, roll the dough as thin as possible, working from the center out to fill the sheet. Brush the top with olive oil, sprinkle with fresh herbs and salt, any other toppings. Slip the parchment onto the hot baking sheet and bake for 8 - 10 minutes until the edges are brown and crispy and the top is golden and browned in places. For the most crispness, err on the side of brownness. Remove the parchment from the oven and let cool. Cover tightly to store. Repeat with remaining pieces.

Lying With Dogs...

2008-09-07T21:44:00.000-07:00

You'll be sure to get a few fleas.

Are your friends and acquaintances keeping you from making necessary changes to your life? Just something to think about. It's an issue that has arisen a lot in my life lately, with one of my stepsons to be exact. Now, I have yet to be fond of one of my stepsons' girlfriends, with one exception. (Hi Diana!) But Petar has reached an all time low with this one. And it ain't doing him any good.

Girlfriend seems, um, spoiled. Rotten. And not as a term of speech. I mean, she has no grounding in reality. She honestly thinks people should give her whatever she wants, and right now, thank you. For instance, she drives a very nice new SUV that her parents bought her. She told me they were going to buy her a different very nice SUV and she threw tantrums until they got her the exact one she wanted.

:-\ It's wearing off on Petar. Heaven help us.

She lives at home, does as she pleases, and doesn't seem to have a plan. Her parents are okay with that. More and more, that describes Petar as well--except for the parents part, and, no, we're quite ticked off about the whole thing. He has become very difficult to live with and is spending more money on clothing and room decor, less money on saving. More time on hanging out and fiddling with hair, less time doing his only assigned chore and working toward a future that does not include living in your parents' house. College? Doesn't fit neatly between hanging out at wine bars and whatever else they do.

So they both work at Macy's and that's where they'll both be for the foreseeable future. But enough about my kids.

I've noticed I also have a certain tendency to copy my friends. Some of the similarities are because like attracts like, but, for instance, I stopped wearing surf-brand t-shirts every day a few years ago because I had a friend who thought tees were juvenile. Suddenly I felt too old for them. And I know I am most tempted to fall off the simplicity path when I am surrounded by people with a lot of nice things. If someone tells me they don't believe in global warming, I just smile and nod. I am easily swayed, and I don't think I'm the only one.

What has worked for me so far is to remember why I do what I do. It's not to prevent global warming or because I like feeling deprived. It's because I don't think it is morally acceptable to take more than my share. When I picture different places on our planet in my head, I see a lot of need. We probably have enough food for everyone except--oops--we throw so much of it away. And it's the same with everything. There just isn't an infinite supply of stuff, so I try to take only what I need, and be thankful for it.

There are other reasons for being green. I don't like the thought of our earth being one big landfill and, as a lifelong asthmatic, I do appreciate breathing more than most people. But the taking-only-my-share is my personal mission. And it's what I hold onto in a sea of wasteful people who may or may not think less of me if I don't fall into step with them.

It's good to examine your heart and know exactly what your principles are. You see, I can feel comfortable rolling my eyes and walking away when people try to engage me about global warming. Global warming is so beside the point to me. I'm about being equitable, and no one can argue with that. That's my stand. And it has saved me from a lot of backtracking and slippery slope-ing.

And here's another good thing to remember: if people only accept you when you consume or waste at the same level as they do, who cares about their shallow, close-minded opinion anyway? If Petar had a backbone and a mantra (I'm saving for culinary school, so no Dolce and Gabbana tees for me), he would be able to stand up to Miss Thang. She would fade away, which she'll do eventually anyway, and he could move on to someone with substance. And get an education, too.

Just a Lazy Saturday

2008-09-06T11:15:00.000-07:00

So, it's just a lazy Saturday around my house. A day to relax and...

Clean out the entire house. And I mean: The. Entire. House. It's a freakin' pigsty. All of it. Each one of the 3400 square feet. A mess.
Finish a writing job. I just have to revise a sales letter, mainly add a few fake reviews. Ah, the marketing world. Since being in it I believe absolutely nothing. It is all a lie, even Santa Claus.
Make this week's to-do lists.
Fix up the homeschool organization's website.
Figure out what classes I need to take this semester, and how I will pay for them and childcare.
Line up some more writing jobs. See #5.
Plan this week's lessons.
Work on an afghan I am making for my stepdaughter. Several hours into it, my dh walks by and says, "Is that for Alison? She hates that color." Maybe it'll be for someone else.
Play with my website. Do something so it makes money. I have a lot of traffic, but no revenue. I need revenue, see #5.
Buy evening primrose oil and flaxseeds. You see, my hair has been falling out lately (AGAIN) and Dr. Andrew Weil says a lack of certain fatty acids can cause this. I'm willing to try anything. Protein, vitamins, getting off certain hormonal treatments--none of it has worked. He says it may take as long as 6-8 weeks to see an effect. Let's just hope it works faster, because if my hair keeps falling out like this for another month I'll be bald. I wish I could talk to my own doctor about this, but he's busy and I have no insurance anyway.

So that's my lazy, no-stress Saturday. I hope your weekends are similarly relaxing!

Blog Tags

2008-09-04T22:52:00.001-07:00

I'm really trying to put labels on my posts, but I keep forgetting. I remember with the doctor stuff. I don't know why I label those, except perhaps to make it easy to remove them when they discover my covert whining and sue me for libel. Except it isn't libel if it's true.

Warning: my opinions about everything on this blog, including my doctor's office, are just that: opinions. They are true, at least from my perspective, but ya know how perspective can be when you have a sick baby and a rude scheduling lady.

That aside, I want to remember to label my blogs because that would be a very organized thing to do.

The difference between libel and slander? Libel is in writing, and even private correspondence counts.

Doctor Drama, Anyone?

2008-09-04T22:30:00.000-07:00

My life as the star of a medical drama continues. I guess everyone has to have a purpose in life, outside of working, raising children, and coming up with ways to save the planet between episodes of Clean House. Here, in the order that they disturb me, are the latest vignettes in this episode of my life:

1. I called Doctor D.'s office back on Wednesday as instructed by the Tuesday girl. The Wednesday girl told me that he had nothing open and reminded me that I should call at the beginning of the week. I did, I told her. Monday was a holiday, and I called at precisely 8 AM Tuesday morning. Actually, I had called the previous Monday and there were no openings then either. I shared this with Wednesday and asked, If I call back Monday, will there really be an appointment available? She said (and I quote exactly here): You can call whenever you want, but that doesn't mean you'll get an appointment.

I can feel my hair falling out from stress, (sigh).

2. When my mother was calling repeatedly on Tuesday morning, it was actually my stepfather using her phone. She was admitted to the hospital and it ended up she needed (guess, c'mon, you can do it...) a ruptured appendix removed. She had heart issues due to anesthesia also. Go, Mom! She just needed to outdo Tyler.

3. Female issues. I'll spare you icky details about my girl parts. You can send the thank you cards to my email address.

4. Rachael's eczema is back. She is late for a well child visit, too. It's that one I keep trying to schedule. If I can't get one this Monday, I'll go the back door route and call Docta' D's medical assistant. I always feel like I'm cheating when I do that. But we need our check up.

What shall I call my masterpiece? Emily's Anatomy? Mommy MD?

A Morning in the Life of a Very Frustrated Mother

2008-09-02T08:09:00.000-07:00

Right now I am on the phone with my doctor's office to make an appointment. So far I have heard an folksy remake of Sting's Fields of Barley, a possible Steely Dan song about Daddy don't live in New York City no more (sic), and now, some sort of elevator music.

If I am going to be left on hold for hours at a time, here are a few things I would like to hear:

Dane Cook's comedy bit on Kool Aid (Oh yeah? Oh no!)
Yael Naim
The new song by Ne-Yo, the one from the Overstock.com commercial
Fiona Apple

Seriously, who likes elevator music? Is it supposed to be calming? Several times the phone has sounded like someone was picking up--music pauses, office-y typing sounds in the background. But then, more elevator music. I've missed two calls from my mother while waiting this morning. Tyler is wondering what to do for school (just READ, okay, read a book, this is a literature based curriculum so there's no way you can go wrong by READING).

The elevator music has faded away, and now there is jazzy piano. (vomit in mouth) I am not kidding about the Dane Cook. It would put me in a good mood for when the rude scheduling people arbitrarily withhold health care from my child because it's the only power they wield in their minimum wage existence.

Okay, that was mean. I'm sorry.

Can it be? A person! Oops, I was sent to wrong place, I guess. She's transferring me to where I should be. Back to jazzy piano. Okay, another person already, that was fast. And when I try to make an appointment, this is what I get.

"He'll be in tomorrow, but he's full. Beyond that, I just don't know... Can you make an appointment with another doctor?"

When I explain, umm, NO, and ask if I can call back for an appointment with my own doctor, she says...

"You can try. I mean, I don't know when he'll be in or when he'll get his schedule. "

I can try? How kind of you. When can I try? I mean, last Monday you told me to try today. And since when do people try to make doctor's appointments? It is really simple, right? Like trying to jump, trying to blog. You just do it. I pick up the phone and call you, you check his schedule and put me in a slot, not so hard. Why don't you have his schedule anyway, you're his scheduling lady?

Don't worry, I didn't say that.

"Tomorrow, maybe later in the day? Maybe. I'm not guaranteeing it. I'm sorry."

At least she's sorry. The last scheduling lady was never sorry. She acted like I had done something wrong. I told you to call when we opened, and now it's 8:27. Of course I can't give you an appointment now.

Well, now you have witnessed in real time (kinda) a morning in my life. My doctor has told me that when this happens, I should ask to talk to his medical assistant and that she can usually fit me in. But his medical assistant is apparently not aware of this recommendation. She is always a little confused about why I am talking to her and not his scheduling girl. I save the MA trick for emergencies, for times when we honestly will be in the emergency room if the sitch isn't dealt with and soon. So I'll be calling back tomorrow. This only took 27 minutes of my morning.

MacGuyver Monday: Back to School Wardrobes

2008-09-01T20:58:00.000-07:00

What does a homeschooling family know about Back to School shopping? More than you would think! We didn't always homeschool, so there was a time when I had to get six people fully outfitted every August. I still try to celebrate these little cultural rituals, although the pressure is definitely lower. So how am I keeping this big family in stylish clothing? The same way I ran charity events and the same way I manage a writing career: by being organized and making lists.

The list making comes first. Your first list should be a "need" list for each child. Never mind what they have, just list the bare essentials of a passable back to school wardrobe for your area and social class. For a homeschooling family in Central Washington, this might look like: 5 everyday/play outfits, 3 nice outfits, 2 church outfits, tennis shoes, boots, coat, snowpants, 3 pair pajamas. For a family in school, you would probably need 'nice clothes' every day, so adjust as needed.

Now, inventory all of the potential school clothes you have on hand from last year, hand-me-downs, and the deals you find here and there. I am always on the look-out for free and cheap clothes, so I usually have a substantial pile for each child. Have your children try on their clothes. Things that are too big go back to your clothing storage (whatever that may be), and things that are too small get passed down. Compare your "have" lists to your "need" lists and note any shortfalls. This is your shopping list.

If I was determined to spend no money, I would now begin looking for ways to repurpose. My love of pillow case dresses is legendary, but pillowcases also make nice skirts and jumpers. Pants with torn or worn knees can be cut off and hemmed to make shorts, or sewn into a cute skirt like this one. Sewing clothing is usually more expensive than buying, but if you have fabric on hand, even in the form of unwanted sheets and curtains, free patterns are all over internet. You can also request clothing on Freecycle, or ask friends what they are doing with their children's cast-offs.

Next, I would hit thrift stores with a very specific list of what I need. I actually did this today and my list read something like:

White turtleneck--Grace
Hot pink top--Rachael
Off-white top--Rachael
Black snowboarding pants--Tyler
...

And so on. It was a long list.

A tip: do not buy anything not on your list at this point. List items are receiving priority because they are immediately needed.

Another tip: many thrift stores regularly publish coupons or have special days when certain items are cheaper. Don't be afraid to ask!

If you have tapped the thrift stores and still have items on your list, move on to cheaper stores like Target, T.J. Maxx, and Old Navy. If you have an outlet mall nearby, hit that as well. I find amazing deals at Nordstrom Rack, so check there if one is near you. I know there are environmental and social implications to buying mainstream retail garments, but if you have managed until this point to get everything used, a few fill-in items will have minimal impact. As for WalMart, I avoid it like the plague because I need my stuff to last.

Done? Hopefully you have found everything you need at this point. I did this routine today, and my Back to School shopping came to $56 for four kids and their clothes horse mommy. Not too shabby! There are a few items I'm still keeping an eye out for, but we'll all be on-trend when we sit down to the kitchen table for Latin tomorrow morning.

A tip on buying ahead: I buy things before I need them, but without a framework, I would end up with lots of disconnected items that don't translate into outfits. My policy is to limit buying ahead to basics (like jeans, khakis, polos, cardigans, etc) and matched outfits. If I see something adorable at a great price, I'll pick it up, but only if it is worth having to buy a matching piece at full retail price. Of course, if it's free, just take it and say thank you. Another good way to weave scattered clearance deals into a cohesive look is to plan a wardrobe theme. Not everything has to match the theme, but, for example, my 6 year old daughter loves animal prints so I bought her leopard print ballet flats, skirts, and tops as I found them.

"Back to School" Impact

2008-08-28T10:48:00.000-07:00

Is it possible for Back to School to be green?

If you're a traditional schooler, I just don't know. Really. Here are a few ways that public/private schooling affect the environment:

1. Driving. Whether bussed or driven by mom, millions of children have to go to and from somewhere every weekday.

2. Waste. Because of the nature of serving large numbers of people, most schools use disposable products. Disposable dinnerware, papers used on only one side, paper towels. A cafeteria garbage can is full of perfectly eatable, untouched food. And wrappers; moms who send lunches have the food wrapped in plastic because we all know kids can't seem to fit the gladware back in their lunchboxes.

3. Chemicals. Again, this is caused by the nature of serving large numbers of people. You need bad-#%$ cleaners to make those bathrooms usable, and lots of them. Lawns get sprayed with toxic chemicals for weeds and bugs; plastic, paint, and other fumes float through the air.

4. Paper. Teachers are not amused when you hand in an assignment written on the back of another assignment.

5. Clothing, and keeping up with the Jennifers. When my stepkidlets were in school, they needed a constant influx of stuff. Not just clothes, although clothes were definitely part of it. Sunglasses, specific brands of backpacks, uni-ball pens because they just feel nicer, accessories. Shopping at a thrift store was an appalling idea; they wouldn't even go inside. This is not only ghastly expensive, it also creates waste as perfectly good items were discarded to make room for the latest thing. Luckily, I saved a lot of it and it is now used by my homeschooled junior high schooler and my husband. My 13 year old has been dressed for two years from one teenager's senior year wardrobe... dressed well, and I still have a few huge boxes of other stuff for when this round gets stained, torn, or otherwise ruined.

That's one kid, one year. And I have personally seen kids brutally teased for not having this stuff, so I wasn't willing to put my darlings in that sitch.

Anyway, let's compare this to a homeschooler.

1. Driving. Yes, we do some driving on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. I combine lessons with errands and one of these days Mrs. March and I are going to work out a carpooling plan. I'd say I drive around half as much as I did when I had kids in school, and it still feels like a lot.

2. Waste. Very un-encouraged. In fact, it's one of the only ways to get mom to blow her top. Creative leftover use is encouraged, and if you are getting a cup of water, put that glass where you can find it the next time you're thirsty. Disposable? Are you kidding me? I budget about five bucks a month on paper products, and that needs to include toilet paper for a family of eight.

We don't throw away food, we eat food. And it's real, recognizable agricultural products that are usually less than a week and a few miles removed from their origin. No canned stuff and what-is-in-the-chicken-nugget-cuz-you-know-chicken-isn't-spongy-like-that.

3. Chemicals? I clean with vinegar, sometimes diluted bleach. My husband has our lawn sprayed, though, and I get so mad about it but he's the manager of the company that does it so I can't cancel behind his back. I can live with crab grass; he thinks it reflects badly on our family and his job. Other toxins are just not here, partly because we gravitate toward used stuff that has already released its icky chemicals, and partly because I won't buy anything with a chemical I can't pronounce. Heavy duty cleaners just aren't necessary in the average household.

4. Paper. We mainly use the backsides of memos from my husbands job.

5. Clothing. Handed down, freecycled, bought on sale or used, and assigned to the Marshall family's complicated hierarchy of clothing. At the top is church clothing, which is fancy and usually matches the siblings' outfits. Then there are 'town clothes' which we wear out in public, to doctor's appointments, to lessons and co-ops. If they become less-than-perfect, they are re-assigned to everyday clothing. Last are the mud clothes: stained, mended, barely covering our backsides... these are not just for mud, but for painting and other super messy tasks. They are practically disposable.

The hand-me-down hierarchy is just as complicated. Church clothes and town clothes are handed down, everyday clothes go to the garage sale or freecycled, and mud clothes become rags and quilts.

As for 'stuff', I am against it and don't buy it. My kids have no one to impress. The other homeschoolers are just as cheap as I am, and they won't care if my daughter has a brand new Hannah Montana folder or an old file folder with a scribbled out label. They get 'stuff' as presents and from Freecycle, but I refuse to put a line in my budget for it.

Whether you are a public schooler, private schooler, or homeschooler, there are ways to make your stay on our little planet just a little less wasteful. What are you doing for our Earth?

Exes and Hexes

2008-08-28T10:16:00.001-07:00

Grrr.

I just need to vent here.

My oldest son, Tyler, is from a previous relationship. He visits his dad and stepmother for a month in the summer every year and comes back with a lot of general information about how I am viewed by my ex and his wife. I like to call it "Melinda Said". As in:

Melinda said you should send me to public school because she went there and turned out okay.

Melinda said you are ripping off companies by ordering freebies. She says it's fraud. (This came after the question, "what is fraud?" and I said, "well, it's when you steal from a company in a sneaky way. Why?")

Melinda said your house must be a mess with so many kids. (Tyler said he tried not to laugh because I keep a very clean house and he can't get through their living room without tripping four times)

Melinda said you don't feed me healthy food. (At least I feed him at all.)

Melinda said you shop at thrift stores because you are cheap, and that all Jews are cheap. (Melinda's of Arab descent and has a lot of opinions about Jews, Muslims, and the interaction between them.)

Melinda said I don't have enough socks. (I only sent a few pair because he wears flip-flops all summer. And then she bought him a package of socks to prove how dire she felt the situation was . They came home brand new and unworn. Thanks for the socks, guys. He already had about thirty pair, but it's a nice thought.)

And it goes on and on. It's not worth picking a fight over, and it really makes Tyler dislike her. It actually has the opposite effect than what I think Melinda intends, because most of it is obviously untrue. When he tries to argue with her, he gets scolded and told not to talk back. Fair enough; he shouldn't be sassing his stepmother. She's still an adult authority figure.

It's been a good lesson for me, because it makes me realize how easy it is for a well-meaning person to say things to a child that are upsetting. For instance, several years ago I bought some square white dinner plates. I bought them at Macy's for a hefty price (for me), and I was really proud of them. So, the first time I served dinner on them, my stepson informed me that I should have bought black. Why? Because his mom has square black plates.

His mom is one of those people who over-shops at cheap stores. Know what I mean? Some people buy plates once a decade at Macy's; others buy them every year at WalMart. They end up spending about the same. It's a matter of habit and perspective. And I should have said nothing, but I instead said something like: Who wants to eat off black plates? How unappetizing. And they don't even have that stuff at the stores where I shop.

In retrospect, it was very bitchy of me, and I'm sure it was carried home to mom and made to sound like I mounted a detailed attack on her dinnerware and her preferred retail establishments. I don't feel too guilty, though, because I know she uses her visitation to indoctrinate her children against their dad and me. And the kids see it as : look how much these people upset Mom, what is wrong with them? Or else, they think she just needs a friend and they should try to be there for her. So totally not a kid's job, not even an adult kid. And she knows it.

I try to keep my mouth shut. I try *so very* hard, and most of the time I succeed. But I'm getting it from both sides here: his ex and my ex.

It's more important that the kids be spared this crap than for me to come out 'right'. I just have to keep that perspective.

Thankful Thursday: Freecycle

2008-08-21T08:41:00.000-07:00

Boy, am I thankful for Freecycle.

This week we got three big bags of toys (four? was there a fourth?) from Freecycle and found another Yakima Mommy blogger. TJ at http://dtkmkihn.blogspot.com/ lives less than a mile from me, and her kids had some decent hand-me-downs. Here are a few of our faves from the loot.

Malcolm likes dinosaurs and dragons, so he was happy to add a few to his collection.

Grace thinks the purple cat is a Bratz kitty, which is so thrilling for her because I won't buy anything Bratz... we have enough brats in our home, thank you. So, Bratz or not, this little plastic kitty has a place of honor on her bookcase.

Rachael is in love with this Elmo phone. Ironically, I gave away this exact phone on Freecycle about two years ago. Could it be the same one?

Ignore the furniture in the background, please--it's our family room, which is outfitted exclusively in hand-me-downs and Freecycle finds because we go through furniture like a winery goes through grapes. The antiques and Pottery Barn splurges refuse to enter.

Other things we've been gifted on Freecycle? Hangers, clothes for the kids (five separate occasions this year in fact), new bedding sets for the girls' room, an entertainment center, a mahogany armoire (not sure why they were giving that away...), old records, maternity clothes. Lotsa stuff. Even better is having a place to give things away. I don't usually post because I tend to give away things to people I know, but I always check people's 'wanted' ads. It's nice to email someone who has no baby stuff and tell them you have everything from crib to onesies if they want it. So check out Freecycle if you aren't already dialed into it... there's one in almost every community.

A few pet peeves about Freecycle: it's an environmental thang, but some posters have refused to give me items because they were holding out for someone who sounded needier. So, they basically want a story writing contest? lol. I also get a little annoyed when I drive across town for a bag of boys' size 4 clothes and it ends up to be a bag with one size 4 stained t-shirt and the rest adults XL (really happened). Or when I pick up three bags of size 2T clothes and they are all 12 mos or smaller. But usually I can find someone who can use the surplus (in both cases I did), and I love the constant flow of new stuff into our house. It inspires me to increase the flow of stuff out of our home, and there's no cost, financial, environmental, or otherwise.

To Cool Off... My Baby Sister in the Snow Last Winter

2008-08-20T13:45:00.000-07:00

Crockpot in the Morning, Crockpot in the Evening, ...

2008-08-19T08:47:00.000-07:00

This morning I woke up and a hot, healthy breakfast was ready to eat. No, my husband didn't get on a helpful streak (those of us who know my husband are laughing right now... he has many fine qualities, but he's happy to leave all housework to me). I made crockpot oatmeal. And it was SOOOO good. Here's the recipe I used:

Ingredients:

Butter or oil
2 cups of oats, not instant or quick. Just plain oats.
5 cups of liquid--we do half milk and half water
If desired, about one cup of add-ins, like: nuts, dried berries, etc

Instructions:

Butter or oil the inside of the crockpot well.
Add oatmeal and liquid, plus add-ins
Cook on low 6-8 hours

If you are the type who actually gets a good night's sleep, this recipe will be no good for you. Those of us who are creeping by on 5-6 hours will find this recipe a good way to soak up some of the black coffee.

A few thoughts on crockpots: New ones cook much hotter than the old ones. My crockpot was five bucks at a garage sale--this is the only way it matches my other appliances--and is, I assume, an older one. I'm not sure, though. If anyone would like to try this recipe in a confirmed new crockpot and report back, I'd be much obliged. I don't know if you've seen the cost of bulk oatmeal lately... it won't be an expensive experiment.

I recommend using dried apples, pecans, and apple pie spices as extras. Dried cranberries and dark chocolate chips are always good; just add the chocolate chips when you serve.

Crockpot 365 is a blog dedicated exclusively to--you guessed it--using the crockpot.

The In Group and the Out Group

2008-08-18T21:15:00.000-07:00

Even though I am a practicing Christian, I really dislike hanging around other Christians. Almost every church I've been to has seemed swept away in jargon--Have you been born again in the blood of the lamb?--and totally self-congratulatory--We are so Awesome. We worship God in this totally unique way. Wouldn't ya know, it's the only way He wants to be worshipped, and I know this because I have Him on speed dial and also I have this little used translation of the Bible that isn't accepted by any other church...

This is how I ended up Catholic. Not because I think they are right about everything, but because Catholics feel so guilty and inadequate. It cuts down on the smug.

So, anyway. A friend, an intelligent Christian friend, whose beliefs I would respect just because they happened to be hers, said that she has hesitated to join a local homeschooling group because of the statement of faith. The statement of faith is loosely based on the Apostles' Creed, which many people (I'm told) feel is a tool of exclusion.

Oh, I hate exclusion. I have been the popular girl, the girl who the popular girls hated, the girl who hated the popular girls... Adolescence sucks, and I feel no need to recreate it in my adult relationships. I don't think it's a requirement to be a Christian. Christ was inclusive. He included everybody who came with an open heart, and even a few who didn't. I try to emulate that.

On the other hand, I think we can believe things, and have a group based on said beliefs, without excluding others. But if the others feel excluded, we have effectively excluded them just by failing to include them. Is that confusing enough? I don't want cool, funny, smart families to be afraid to join our party. And, apparently, they are.

How do I fix this?

MacGuyver Monday: Money, Money, Money

2008-08-18T08:44:00.000-07:00

Grow a garden.
Buy in bulk.
Drive a more fuel efficient car.

What do the above have in common? They, like many money-saving tips, require more investment and waiting time than a strapped family has. When I was twenty, my then-husband and I split up unexpectedly just before we were set to move to another state, and I found myself jobless and moneyless with a small child. What do you do if you are hit over the head with a sudden financial shortfall? You MacGuyver your finances.

Step One: Cut Your Food Bill

The priority is to keep a roof over your head and keep any wage earners earning (or get them earning again). Where do groceries fit in to that? They don't. Most Americans have pantries full of food, yet we head to the grocery store every weekend for another cart full. If needed, most of us could squeeze two weeks' of meal out of our kitchen. You may end up with some unorthodox combinations toward the end, but if you treat it like an adventure, your family can have fun with this.

When your pantry is running low, the Hillbilly Housewife has a $40 emergency menu and shopping list that, while not nutritionally optimal, is certainly as healthy as the average American diet and is dirt-cheap.

My friend Mrs. Hannigan gets just about everything for free with coupons, but she has a few years of this lifestyle under her belt. If you are new to the world of couponing for free stuff, Couponmom.com can help guide you. Just remember: you cannot afford to "spend to save". If you can combine coupons and sales to get things absolutely free, take advantage. But beware of becoming one of those coupon freaks who spends $400 a month on shampoo but swears they are saving so much.

If your cupboards are truly bare and you don't see a paycheck in your near future, go to a foodbank. Many of us donate to food banks because we know some people find themselves in dire situations through no fault of their own. Save what little money is left for things like housing and electric, things that aren't readily available

Step Two: Impose a Spending Moratorium

That means no Starbucks, no non-work-related driving, not even a trip to the Goodwill. As long as you have clothing to cover your back, you don't need anything else. Remember that this is temporary. Eventually you'll bounce back, but until then, your kids may have to enjoy homemade birthday presents or go to school without supplies. This too shall pass.

Step Three: Cancel Everything

Be smart here. Cable can go, high speed internet can go, but if you have to pay $200 to cancel your cell phone, do the math. How long will you need to do without? Does your breadwinner need that phone? Can you cancel your landline and use the cell instead? You want to pay as little as possible, so keep your calculator at hand.

Step Four: Cut Your Electric Use

Pretend you are in a third world country and have no electric. Would you have television? No. A dryer? No. A toaster? Most likely not.

It's easy to live without a toaster. It's hard to live without a refrigerator. The longer you can do without things like toasters and clothes dryers, the longer you will have money for things like refrigerators. Focus on what you physically need. Everything else should be unplugged and put away.

Step Five: Increase your Income

It's as easy as it sounds. In my case, as a 20 year single mother, I took a low-paying job as a nurse's aide trainee (every community needs nurse's aides because no one wants to do that kind of work). It allowed me to work nights, when relatives could watch my toddler. It was the worse job I have ever had... the worse job I have ever even heard of, but it brought in a regular paycheck and now I have a unique perspective on what makes a job truly horrible.

It wasn't enough to live on, at least not with the upper middle class lifestyle in which I was raised, so I told everyone I knew that I was looking for work. I organized houses, cleaned group homes, and sewed Halloween costumes (among other things). I did surveys in my spare time. I traded farm labor for rent. And while I was doing all this, I took college classes so I wouldn't have to live like that forever.

If you are determined not to leave your children, there are a lot of things you can do for money at home.

If you have a quick way to save money or earn it, leave me a message and I'll add it in.

Something from Nothing Saturday: Pillowcase Dresses

2008-08-16T09:19:00.000-07:00

For my daughter's sixth birthday, my good friend Mrs. Hannigan gave her all the ingredients needed to make an adorable stylish dress: a pillowcase, a length of ribbon, and some elastic. The dress we are making is like the one here except that it has ribbons instead of fabric ties on the shoulders. You can find cool pillow case clothes all over the web, but my favorites are at:

Maya Made
Molly Coddle
Mothering.com

If you want to buy one, or if you are an awesome seamstress and can copy designs from sight, there are some cute pillow case apparel ideas at Pillow Case Dresses. If you get bored with them, check out these easy homemade onesie dresses and t-shirt dresses.